Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date with a guy. I lost interest in him quick, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom, hoping to make a run for the hills. As soon as I reached the front door, our server yells out, "I hope you’re not thinking about dining and dashing!" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Today, I went on a date that went well, until the bill came and she quickly shoved it in my direction, then went to the loo. Rude, but I thought nothing of it… until our waiter took pity and told me I’m the fourth guy she’s had this week who'd been made to pay for her. I paid half, then went home. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML
Today, I was out on a dinner date when suddenly a girl walks up to us and says to my date, "Girl, you can do so much better." Hearing this, my date looks at me, nods, gets up and walks off. I still had to pay for everything. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, while on a first date, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was still tired from pulling an all-nighter, and fell asleep on the toilet. When I woke up and rushed back out, my date was gone. Everyone now thinks I'm an arsehole who pulled the old "window escape" trick on her. FML
Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML
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Top comments
soulstrike23 6
Don't sweat it she probably has issues to jump to conclusions like that
randomguy76 14
FHL, she must have gone through dates escaping far too many times to have a reaction like that.
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Comments (102)
soulstrike23 6
Don't sweat it she probably has issues to jump to conclusions like that
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
you shouldn't have held it that long and gone to the restroom before the bill...
JMichael 26
most people don't have to go until after they're done eating.
Shadowvoid 33
Where is your statistical evidence? Most people use the bathroom whenever they need to go and can.
smackaroonial 20
The thing I don't understand is, isn't it normal for most guys to cover the bill anyway?
littleteapot 21
It depends on who asked who out. If I were to ask a guy out, I'd be prepared to pay.
quarterbird 18
Why blame the victim? At what moment OP chose to use the restroom is irrelevant.
Fou_Lou 20
It depends on where you live. I the US it seems to be expected. In my country splitting is normal unless its clearly stated. So i wouldn't expect to pay for the other one even if i asked out someone. I would have paid my part and give the resturant owner all the Information about the person i have (name and if i know adress and if i have contact information) and let them handle how they get their money back. Dunno how it is in the US but here you can only be made accountable for that what you order and eat and not the stuff someone else eats.
tranced_ 45
Was it chicken tikka masala?!
kerstileann 26
Most likely not...
SnakeEye_454 10
Ya know, I don't think you would want anything serious with her.
IvyRizzzzoli 25
Or anything at all if she makes herself look super aggressive right off the bat
Chilupa 28
Agreed. Sounds like she has major trust issues.
fortune789 17
OP definitely definitely doges a bullet with that one. The 7 year old from the last FML will probably grow up to be like her.
randomguy76 14
FHL, she must have gone through dates escaping far too many times to have a reaction like that.
Steve95401 49
I can't imagine why guys would want to ditch her. She seems so pleasant and nice.
Kielnmsoftly 26
No, FHDL(**** her dates' lives) if she was so weird or their own problems made them have to jump out a window.
T1A2Z3 35
Or maybe it's a clever plan so she never has to pay? If the OP texts and appoligizes she'll go out with him again but start another fight and storm out footing him with the check...
Vagitarian1 10
Good riddance.
LegalLoitering 12
At that point, you probably should climb out the window.
ilovefall10 21
I see that she's been on this site to think that.
UnidentifiedFun 37
Sounds like she's been burned in the past. Still an overreaction though.
patrickalamo 48
Your dodging a bullet there my friend.
Steve95401 49
You're