Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML
Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
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Top comments
mufc4everch 2
Why can't you stand bums?
tylersign 11
You just.. Hit him? I hope you had tons of personal information in the wallet, along with money. If so, you deserved it. Also, I hope your balls fall off.
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Comments (243)
deliriousbasil 0
Well deserved, OP! Mind your own business... Tssss
xrach 3
OP, you deserved it, you massive jerk.
craZgal321 6
i dont like bums either. i would have done the same thing
EffYoLife 14
You're a bum your damn self.
white16sox 19
100, I have no clue what you just said. 81, just because they're homeless that doesn't mean they weren't a doctor that fell into debt. Or maybe they were trying to start a family and they were evicted from their house. You could just as easily become homeless at any point.
MyLoveDrunk 11
Let's just take a moment to take in the fact that this person is 14. Got that? Now you can make the assumption that she's more than likely not worth debating with. Young kids don't understand many things.
plaguer 26
Because I'm guessing you and OP wouldn't have hit him if he were not a bum, but still stealing from someone.
deliriousbasil 0
I'd kick your balls for just that comment, 81. Now wait, there are none - that's why you're a pussy!
craZgal321 6
i mean i understand if they are just war veterans or somthing like that... but if you look back at the FML you would see that bums are not always good
pagullarka 9
I think people sometimes living in big houses can be meaner and worse, just cause you're on the street doesn't make you a bad person.
Crystal55621 19
Op, I'm sorry, but why the hell would you just hit somebody? One day, somebody is going to beat your ass.
tvhsprodigy 3
It's illegal to hit bums..you deserve it dude!
superswagbro 7
It's also illegal to steal.
white16sox 19
It is also illegal to hit people in general, unless in self defense.
kingkongsdong 5
Self defense is blocking or running away. To strike another is an attack regardless of the Reason, just saying.
shakespearelove 6
It's illegal to assault a person, not just bums. and on top of it being illegal, it's also immoral.
Warmonger_Smurf 29
No dumb ass self defense includes kicking punching and weapons. If you attack me I have every right to blow your head off.
theevilduchess 12
Douche. You deserved it.
ohreallynow1992 3
Amen to that! Living in a city with a high population of homeless people, I personally know quite a few. They're just normal people who were dealt a bad hand...
ddddddddg 9
'sniff' why not? ;(
EffYoLife 14
That's what you get. You're one paycheck away from being a bum yourself. Don't be so judgmental.
ambernw 2
Woww, just hitting someone because you don't like their "type"? :/