Today, I was making tea when I smelled something burning. My very fluffy cat had put his tail right next to the open flame and burnt his fur. Now I have a semi-hairless cat and a very smelly apartment. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dumbass cat sat on a lit candle. The whole house now smells like burnt hair and I now have to clip clumps of wax-burnt hair off his bum. FML
Today, my cat did the same thing as in the video where a cat lights its tail on fire with a candle and just watches it nonchalantly until it stops burning… Except, instead of watching nonchalantly, he bolted all over the house while screaming his head off. Trying to extinguish him was a nightmare. FML
Today, my cat regurgitated his food right on top of a heating vent located on my floor. Now the whole house smells like hot vomit. FML
Today, my cat is extremely sick and has trouble grooming himself. As evidenced by his butt. He laid on me for a while and it wasn't until a few minutes after he got off that I realized he had stained my pants. That also explains why my chair suddenly looks so nasty, and why my room smells horrible. FML
Today, my cat knocked over a cup of scalding hot tea - but don't worry, the carpet wasn't damaged. It went all over my leg instead leaving a nice big scar for my holiday. FML
Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML
Today, I finally got myself settled into bed around 2 in the morning after a very long day. My cat started to snuggle with me when I smelled something disgusting. Turns out my cat sharted in my bed. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML
Today, I tried to give my cat a bath after he got into the attic and got covered in all sorts of shit. Halfway through, he freaked out, jumped out of the tub, and ran around the house dripping wet. He then hid under my bed, and I had to practically dismantle it to get him out. Now my bedroom smells like wet fur and broken trust. FML
Today, I ran into the living room when I heard the smoke alarm going off. Turns out, my friend thought it was a good idea to melt a plastic cup on my floor heater. He also thought the best way to put it out was to urinate on it. My house smells like burnt pee. FML
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Top comments
wolfy120 4
sorry op hope your cats ok
mackdeezy 22
So your pussy had a burning sensation.
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Comments (128)
wolfy120 4
sorry op hope your cats ok
miasaur 11
poor kitty!
JFloUnknown 24
Me too. It could have been worse. My friends cat had it's tail accidentally closed in the door. Out of panic it pulled and ran to get away and tore all the skin off of his tail down to the bone.
shorty6823 28
I did that to my cat once. But she was older and just meowed until I let her out. Took a while. The dog was barking at her for like 10 minutes before I saw what I did
ShyAnn29 15
I had a cat that had her tail broken by one of our dogs, when they snuck past me into my room, it was so sad.
DataWog 30
A neighbour of mine had a cat with only 3 inches of tail after his previous owner shut it in a door... I also had a kitten who was fascinated by EVERYTHING and HAD to sniff/rub against whatever caught his attention at the moment. Eventually, after two rounds of singed whiskers and a large hand-sized patch of fur on his side flared up, we just plain stopped using candles around the house, period. Didn't matter where we put them, he would find them, and no amount of squirting him would make him stop. He was never hurt, thankfully... his whiskers would be 1/2 length for a while, but his nose never got close enough to be burnt, and the fur on his side only burnt at the tips; it flared up in a second then put itself out, didn't leave a bald patch. Could barely even tell where it'd happened. Still scared the everloving crap out of us, though. Neither water nor fire could give that animal a lick of common sense...
JFloUnknown 24
You should have named him 'Catniss, the cat on fire.'
benwshngtn5 2
Everyone loves a hairless pussy!
PoopNuggetLeader 4
Light a match? Oh wait...
JFloUnknown 24
Light two matches?
ShyAnn29 15
No, three matches!
mim777 4
shh
MindFreakazoid 10
THIS. CAT. IS ON FIIRREE~! THIS CAT IS ON FIIIRREEEE~!
mannykiddo 3
On the upside, I hear hairless felines are all the rage!
roxxyfoxxy3 25
84- personally, that has to be the single funniest thing I've heard.
alycion 39
I have mine trained to not go on certain areas, especially around the stove. A squirt bottle works wonders. Only had to correct them a couple of times. I was always afraid they would burn themselves, not to mention the ick factor if them stepping in a litter box then near where I prepare or eat food.
Joshwarrior 39
Well i don't think op's cat needs a squirt bottle now. lol
rg350dx 29
Maybe a fire extinguisher in this case.
xxxbooxxx 16
But what if your cat likes water?
alycion 39
I have yet to meet a cat that likes getting sprayed even if they like water. It's one of the most common ways of training a cat. It worked on Sid as well and he loves water.
erockinthesuburb 17
Yet another instance to answer that age old question.... Dogs rule, cats drool.
evilplatypus 39
45 - My cat doesn't like water, but she isn't afraid of the spray bottle. When I squirt her, she walks up and sniffs the nozzle. She's special...
ElatedEarthling 15
My cat loves water too. He'll try to hop in the shower, sink, and toilet occasionally. The spray bottle is like a kitty fun party for him, he loves it. It's extremely hard to train him.
HaraAishi 8
45, My friend's cat jumped in the shower with her. But the spray bottle idea is great, if you're consistant.
TotallyAradical 14
My cat would lay in the sink and wait for you to turn the tap on, so he could drink straight from it. Thank you for your time.
Success4444 12
If you haven't seen the video on youtube about keeping cats off the counters with aluminum foil, you need to see it! Cat-launching, I think it was called... They hate the crinkling sound, and it worked like a charm on my bookcases, so my cats don't knock them off the shelves anymore! It is the most awesome idea, because it works when you are not around, and it doesn't hurt the cat!
SammyS2012 21
My cat loved when we used the squirt bottle on him... Hes a strange cat...
Jebitesevsi 11
Fill the bottle with diluted apple vinegar. No animal likes to get sprayed with that.
Joshwarrior 39
I bet your cat learned not to play with fire, and just goes to prove that cats have 9 lives.
mackdeezy 22
So your pussy had a burning sensation.
challan 19
There's a cream for that. Vote no to blue waffles.
LolFMLnot 10
It reminds me of those videos where they burn animals, so sad.
rg350dx 29
Why the hell are you watching videos of people burning animals? That's not something you just happen upon.
Zemmiphobia 11
How does the fml remind you of that?! And why did you feel the need to comment?!
doctor_glitter 6
Fun tip #1: If the videos of burning animals make you upset, avoid watching them.
LolFMLnot 10
I watched only one and couldn't watch it till the end. it was on my Facebook news feed
DataWog 30
I, unfortunately, have seen a video of that sort. It was in a clip about a horrible animal abuser, and fortunately the horrid part only lasted a few seconds as an 'example' of his crimes (prefaced with the usual 'the following could be disturbing to some viewers...' disclaimer). It is NOT something I ever want to see again. This story does not at all remind me of that.
Wizardo 34
Hope your cat is feline alright and you have a funny tail to regale your friends with...
Bakarra 22
Yes OP should feel relieved he narrowly avoided catastrophic events
Bakarra 22
Or maybe she felt...catatonic...
FightMyLiger 19
Apparently cat puns have 9 lives as well.
debbster7 18
At least the cat didn't die...
theycallmekitty 13
Just be glad it was only your cat's fur that got burned! Poor kitty!
feldco1 17
Hope your cat is okay but now you both know that he shouldn't roam on the counter.