Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML
Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
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Top comments
mufc4everch 2
Why can't you stand bums?
tylersign 11
You just.. Hit him? I hope you had tons of personal information in the wallet, along with money. If so, you deserved it. Also, I hope your balls fall off.
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Comments (243)
j_cat187 20
Lucky you weren't shanked
redtigerlily 5
You're a dick. Big time.
Angel_Cacey 7
I can't stand you OP...
RebelYell14 4
Note to OP: bums can't stand you either.
dogpup4 23
**** I clicked FYL by accident. You're a twat.
iwadasn 33
You sound like you would have hit him just because he was a bum, regardless of what he was doing. Your attempt at doing something good was pretty much negated by your awful attitude.
Megatron99 1
Bums are horrible creatures, if i saw one and i thought he was robbing someone i wouldn't have a second thought about smacking him.
merimar3 4
It was a trap!
hhhwat 0
What happened to the good old days when bums would fight over a wedge of cheese.
docscientist 10
You can't stand bums? Yeah, you better show those people worse off than you who's boss. Immediate ydi, you sound like a cuntbag.