Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Captain Badass
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML
Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Stand your ground
Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
Top comments
mufc4everch 2
Why can't you stand bums?
tylersign 11
You just.. Hit him? I hope you had tons of personal information in the wallet, along with money. If so, you deserved it. Also, I hope your balls fall off.
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Comments (243)
Heather645 5
That's why you don't assume things.
efemel94 7
He didn't assume anything
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
Yes. He did. He only assumed wrongly. Lol
rockerlove2013 6
Im pretty sure 'wrongly' isnt a word srry for bein a gramer nazi but shit happends
Heather645 5
Yes he did, he assumed the homeless man was stealing from the other guy.
888pickles888 4
No good deed goes unpunished...
KatjaM 15
"Assumption is the mother of all **** ups".
ghostlilac 25
"When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me."
Bekeliyr 10
Better to take action. Many would've walked by because it's not their problem. This is how you help other people in America.
boofgall 16
Have some level of respect for everyone, until you've had a chance to meet them. They've done you no wrong.
unagi_fml 9
Looks can be deceiving
gill4liife 0
When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me. :)
ellenmellon 6
Wrongly is a word
Heather645 5
That's why you don't assume things.
richy90255 8
Helping isn't always the best choice
jackassiddy 8
^ You're right. That's why when I see someone in distress I just say **** that shit. Then I hide from karma.
PrincessPesa 20
This is actually quite sadly true. Many people are killed or injured while chasing an assailant or getting involved in some sort of assault. I once had a lovely, elderly teacher who would regularly give packaged food directly to homeless people, and one man literally pelted it at her face. OP was trying to make the world a better place but sadly we just can't trust others to not hurt us when we help, especially if they're already emotionally vulnerable, like the homeless.
mufc4everch 2
That's sad about your teacher 23. But I don't think OP was really trying to make the world a better place.
KiddNYC1O 22
52- I agree. Especially since op said he can't stand bums...
HarleyJM 7
He just saw the opportunity to smack a bum!
jackassiddy 8
23-I respect your opinion, and this FML is a horrible example, but it upsets me to see people so quick to say best not to help. Our society, as a whole, have become self-centered rather than self-sacrificing, strangers to our neighbours, and hostile towards strangers. I realize we don't live in a world of butter cups and rainbows, but I'd rather die trying to facilitate good than live passive to evil. *steps down from soap box*
ImDaBes 6
90- I couldn't agree more. People shouldn't back down from trying to help others, OP's mistake wasn't trying to help, it was assuming the one dressed like a bum was a criminal.
evig_fml 16
I think your all insane, here is the real world in a nutshell, people are self centered, it's not just human nature it's the nature of life, Do you ever see a rabbit help another rabbit out of a snare? Of course not, it's because animals are self-centered and like it or not no matter how you dress a person up, no matter how educated you make him, man down to his core is just another animal with the same tendencies and instincts of any other animal
Llama_Face89 34
The problem is if you do put yourself out there to help someone these days, a lot of the time you're going to be taken advantage of.
Senseless_487 29
There are many states where if you see a crime being committed, and do nothing to help (intervening, calling the police), then you're considered an accomplice to the crime, and are held just as liable as the person committing it.
jackassiddy 8
126-Not necessarily true. Certain species will help their own. Some, such as elephants, will even morn the death if it dies. Also, I don't know why ^ this comment is getting thumbed down. He's right. In my state they're are even laws like this for trained medical personnel who are off duty. If they can revive someone on the street and don't and that person dies they can be held accountable. Bam. knowledge.
esines 9
^ that's how it is most places. If you are trained and can help the person, you are legally supposed to help them. Ex; an off duty lifeguard is supposed to help a drowning person
wolfshadow 4
Homeless people usually have mental health issues, which is why they have erratic behavior, even of someone is helping them. There are mental health institutions that just kick out patients because they cause to much trouble, so instead of being helped, they become homeless drug addicts who can't control themselves. That could be why food was throw at your friends face. I see bums when I walk down San Francisco, and it's horrible how many people treat them horribly. :( OP should try being a bum to see what it's like.
HarleyJM 7
Sadly the human race isn't evolved enough to care about each other, to be honest I think we will become extinct before we ever care, There are a few exceptions ofcourse!
419 0
Says the baby shaving his butt...
ImDaBes 6
126 - I agree that people's natural tendency is to be self centered. And most people don't fight that tendency. But isn't that all the more reason that those of us who actually care not turn a blind eye when we see injustice. You compared human beings to rabbits, and while it's true that man is jus another animal I've never sen a rabbit compose music, or paint a work of art, or get married, or do anything of any meaning to the world. Shouldn't we as humans, the most highly evolved species on the planet strive everyday to be more than base animal instinct?
mufc4everch 2
Why can't you stand bums?
cheaptrix 6
Yeah, that's prejudice. Don't judge one man by their brethren.
stevenJB 25
Because FML portrays them (and everything else in the world) as evil!!!!'
gojira666 7
At least you got a punch in?
RaggleFrock 13
Karma.
Satirical 7
Bums are bums. They come into one's life on a day-to-day basis. But sometimes, you just have to unleash your inner fury on them, or in this case, get the shit beaten out of you by two homeless dudes.
Satirical 7
Ah sorry. Apparently I lack reading skills. Now I feel bad for ridiculing those unfortunate few who rush through the FML to post a comment. Karma indeed.
fmlurlife 0
I guess this doesnt need to turn into a deep conversation, but people are not bums! People are PEOPLE who happen to be going through a rough patch. I think its horrible that people treat them like complete sh*t
yummcookie 0
I agree, many homeless people (especially in these times) are only homeless because they lot their homes to debt collectors. Very sad to hear there's people like OP who hate them for no reason...
CaramelMacchiato 13
This has been said more than once, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think OP meant 'bums' as in homeless people. I think he meant 'bums' as in thieves and people who manipulate others. Because in all honesty, if OP meant bums as in homeless people, then they're just being biased and asking for a YDI. This is just one way to look at it.
jsilv2 0
The other guy took his wallet
ohreallynow1992 3
In Florida we having one of the highest rates of home foreclosure and a high rate of homeless individuals.
lackingapathy 0
Today me and my friend were in the street when he jokingly took my wallet, when I tried to take it back, some idiot came out of nowhere and smacked me in the jaw. FML
bassmaestro 10
80-Same here. It's appalling
Shadowvoid 33
I see what you did there. :)
Ameel_fml 19
I don't know about other countries, but here in Australia most bums are university students who couldn't pay their uni fees and/or got kicked out of their homes and had nowhere to go. It's sad that so many are just young people who hoped for a better life. Doubly sad that there are people like the OP who think that just because someone is homeless, they deserve to be hated and smacked across the jaw.
cc_the_beast 6
^I don't know where in Australia you're from, but I've never worked with an ex-Uni student who lives on the streets....I'm not saying they don't exist, but the vast majority of homeless people are homeless because of addiction (drugs, alcohol, gambling etc) and mental health issues.
doctorhook86 25
OP is violent as well as judgemental enough to hate people he doesn't even know. He deserves it.
kristabelli 19
He was referring to homeless people when he said bums. Re-read the fml.
Eila1996 5
Agreed. We need more people like you in the world :)
RaquelW 7
80 & 98 - I'm sure that really affects your life. You poor, unfortunate assholes.
alycion 39
93 - orlando Aldo has the highest rate of homeless families because of tourism taking a dump. So many hotels converted so homeless families could stay together. They are saying it will turn around for us, but I think we need a new governor first.
tdishy 0
"Bums" bother me for 2 reasons. By my office there is an ally about a quarter of a mile away. Every morning when they know people are coming into work they stand outside asking for "beer money". Several times, after people told them no, they would spit on them or start acting like idiots by wailing their arms around and cussing. It gets old after 4 years and these aren't 2 or 3 of the same bums it's about 6 or 7 everyday and always different ones. The second reason, they don't do anything. I understand you've hit rock bottom but you can always change your situation if you truly want to. It cracks me up how people stand up for them or defend them saying how they can't help that they can't get a job. Not true in all cases. There is 7 different offices in my city that help to employ the homeless. So I find bums EXTREMLY annoying, because that's just what they are.
esines 9
Tdishy I've only read a few of your comments now, but you seem like a total douche. I understand that you hate those 6 or 7 bums and find them extremely annoying but that doesn't mean every homeless person is an annoying asshole. Also not everyone can turn around their situation, some homeless are homeless because of mental illness and can't help it. There's actually a homeless man in my town who used to have a home but then it burned down and his entire family died in the fire. Now he is mentally not right and without a home. It's actually really sad
Mommyof2_91 10
What I would like to know is why a guy is robbing a homeless person...wtf
paschale 7
And post traumatic stress disorder, lots of homeless ex army personnel in Australia and i would say the US too
TheBonzaiGirl 0
169- if you think it is so sad that this man is homeless, why not invite him into your own home? You could stop him from being homeless and you won't be sad anymore. :p
Anai08 17
155- It's sad to me that you think you can generalize what all 'bums' are like based on the experience you've had with the few close to your job. That like saying, because you've met 8 'ignorant' black people, you can't stand all black people because their ignorant. It's never okay to generalize personal experience to all of a population. Did you know every single homeless person in the world individually? No? Then you absolutely can't say anyone deserves anyone else's scorn just for being in the category of 'homeless'.
Lludes 5
Most "bums" are alcoholic lazy asses who don't want to work. I know this because my uncle was a bum and he looked for any reason he could to get arrested for roof a bed and 3 meals a day. 90% of bums are bums because they choose to be and the other 10% are homeless because they lost their homes. There's difference between being a bum and being homeless.
Sk8rboi17 13
I can't stand them cause they're useless bags of skin that should be eliminated from society if they don't contribute, they're generally disgusting, retarded and choose to live like that and mooch off others. Also they're always crazy so it wouldn't be a loss to society if they were put down, just my opinion cause I have no use for hobos.
tinysocks 11
Apparently you have not lowered yourself to actually having a conversation with more than one! Perhaps you talked to an ass but there are asses who aren't bums and bums who aren't asses. Hehe.
Eiregal2 10
there by the grace of God go ye. my Nan always said that when she saw someone homeless
AssassinsCRB 0
OP deserved it for slapping: he has testicles.
doctorhook86 25
212: You're dumb.
bloodshot698 0
I cant stand them either
yaoieclipse 3
Heartless bitch
Alchemist_21 26
Wtf. There are WAY too many YDI's for this post. So what if he can't stand bums? He was trying to stop a mugging and got mugged by the same guy he was trying to help. Are you people saying you would just stand there and let someone get robbed?
gatorclay97 28
I don't like the ones that approach you and ask for money, I've given money and food to the ones that hold the cardboard signs but not ones that approach you and ask.
tylersign 11
You just.. Hit him? I hope you had tons of personal information in the wallet, along with money. If so, you deserved it. Also, I hope your balls fall off.
Ari1337 15
That's kinda harsh, from what I can tell from the FML, OP thought that the homeless man was trying to rob the other guy, so he tried to help, although his reasons are wrong, part of him wanted to help. I think. -Waits to get buried in thumbs down.-
FUI2LOW 0
so you were a douche and assumed the homeless guy was stealing just cuz you're prejudiced against them? serves you right asshole
white16sox 19
From my understanding, OP automatically assumed that the man was being robbed because the other guy was homeless. So, when OP decided to hit the homeless man, OP got what they deserved.
HarleyJM 7
I agree, so many people get judged for what they look like, or are. Example if someone was walking around with their hat backwards and pants hanging low people assume they will rob the petrol station!
blloyd420 5
63-He though he was stealing it because he saw them fightimg over it, learn to read
Jaoriprilj 17
Telling someone to learn to read while spelling that same message incorrectly. You're funny. :)
StanSmith_fml 9
It's okay though because the homeless guy probably chased him for five blocks with a knife.
evig_fml 16
I see what you did there Mr. Smith
Annis_x3 7
102- You learn to read. OP saw them fighting and automatically assumed it was the homeless man in the wrong. Merely because he can't stand bums.
deliriousbasil 0
Tyler's right! If I had the chance to see this situation I would have been the second balls-kicker and the one who sat on the face of OP eating a bean stew!
blloyd420 5
142- if u saw a homeless guy and someone else fighting over a wallet who would you think was trying to steal it? Its called common sense
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Well I hope someone stabs you and you die from bleeding out cause no one helps you. People like you who don't help, cowardly standing on the side lines. He made a mistake, but he did act.
stevenJB 25
Damn. It's a win win for that guy and the hobo. Lose for you! Sadness. XD
stevenJB 25
Forming underground society! Gathering their strength for an all our attack on the middle n upperclass!!!
LaughinStock 16
Yeah that's why I got bum insurance, oh and cloud insurance. I see them up there plotting.
stevenJB 25
Those are their evil gods. Telling the high hobo what to do with their ragtag militia.!!!
hahayourmom101 5
^^^ I'm not sure I want to live on this planet anymore...
Llama_Face89 34
38- but not volcano insurance?
Llamassss 21
I'm surprised people still rob people in Florida. There are so many people that carry weapons.
rhysfucker 24
Yes there are.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
So many ******* bums in Jacksonville though. Helped my buddy move outta the projects of that place. It was hell.
ebonyirony 29
Bums? Not just robberies in general?
xJackson 1
Did he yell FOLK GANG 12 12 12?
JessieMongoose 11
What...
xJackson 1
Look it up on YouTube... Folk Gang Deer... I don't care if you scream at me for commenting on my own comment.
cheaptrix 6
Many people comment on their own comment..
RabidBunny 10
Luckily for you, you remembered to install your wallet tracking device :D! Right?
yummcookie 0
No no, the idea is to think "I'll get round to it" then forget until it's stolen.