Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year-old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML
Today, I walked in on my sister shoving her vibrating phone into her privates. Can't erase that image. FML
Today, my 14-year-old sister came into the bathroom while I was in it. When she saw me, she said sorry and left. Little did I know, she took my electric toothbrush to masturbate. FML
Today, my 14-year-old sister asked me how I felt when I first had sexual intercourse. I told her it was personal and was none of her business. She then looked at me and said, "I thought it was nice." I'm 19 and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML
Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old sister, naked, streaming herself eating a banana. FML
Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML
Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML
Today, my sister surprised me by cleaning my room and doing my laundry. She found my journal, condoms and vibrator and decided to share her findings with my family. Oh yes... she also shrunk half my wardrobe. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
isallwaysme 27
Virgins nowadays are like unicorns. There are none.
dzombie 15
I'm pretty sure that's why locks were invented.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (199)
Porcei 18
Either lock the door or place something heavy in front of it next time you decide to **********, silly girl.
Wizzlbang 10
Not everyone has locks, guys. Shouldn't be an excuse, though. My door has no lock an I've NEVER been caught. and I do it with people in the house all the time. And no on knocks. You gotta leave yourself room to abort mission in the blink of an eye when you do that.
Nativeangel412 2
Im a unicorn!
gameover18 17
Virgins are more like dinosaurs than unicorns. They did exist, everyone wants one, but only the small ugly ones made it.
upallnight11 19
Who says all virgins are ugly? That's just stupid and judgmental!
monnanon 14
i think what the above was trying to imply is that many peoples continuing virgin status is not there by choice.
sig4life 18
Well your first vibrator and your first interruption. Congrats, now learn how to use the new invention 'a lock'
everton99 16
I'm on a bus I'm on a bus and I ain't ******* leaving til I cum!
onorexveritas 24
what's up with people not knocking and not locking doors?
Vidimus 13
You didn't think to lock your door? Especially while, I assume, anxious about using it for the first time? YDI, OP.
dvsguy 3
Who cares!?! Enjoy yourself with your vibe and move on. YDI for not looking your door or covering up under a blanket.
rabidpeach 5
maybe she just saw blood and was being observant and not slutty.
Filia_Palladis 8
Somebody slept through his sex ed class...*headdesk*