Today, I was standing on a balcony smoking a cigarette when I noticed a woman giving me strange looks. When I put the cigarette out and went to walk inside she said "You shouldn't smoke while you're pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a stranger had a go at me for smoking while pregnant. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
Today, I had to explain to my pregnant friend that her plan to get drunk and get a tattoo needed to wait at least 8 months. She then went out for a smoke to calm down. FML
Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
OperationNicole_fml 0
Well, at least you won't ever stand on a bus.
Xinxinix 0
Think of it this way, if you look like you're pregnant, you can get away with more stuff. Like yelling at people through the Drive-Thru at McDonalds or something.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (114)
dcapp 0
you shouldn't be smoking in the first place!
outdancing 0
I only said you deserved it because smoking is bad anyways.
kandy_fml 0
That sucks. But maybe you should lose some weight. And stop smoking. It's bad for you anyway.
LittleMissMack 0
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Fat/Overweight/Big is not healthy. Your heart is at risk when you are a heavy person. Add smoking to that and you might as well just call in a room at the hospital now. Grow up. At least she didn't say "you're a fatass and you're smoking? that's disgusting." She was trying to be polite in assuming that you were pregnant. Either lose some weight, or stop complaining.
glass_doll83 0
i would have cussed that woman out six ways from sunday!!!
wrestler_fml 0
exercise. God, is it that hard? If you're so fat that people think you're pregnant, it should have occurred to you that you are fat and lazy! You need to exercise more, and quit smoking, or at least severely limit how much you smoke. I'm not saying this to be rude, I'm saying it because it's the truth and you need to hear it. This is anonymous, so don't get offended; nobody knows who you are. Just take what I said to heart, and I sincerely wish you well, with life, your weight, and- yes- your social life as well. Remember: Being fat does more than simply make some guys unattracted to you, and some girls hate you! It also makes people look at you differently as a person (since you're physically lazy, they somehow assume you will be mentally lazy as well.). In addition, obesity makes people stink (have a stench) more than on-weight people, it makes the skin stretched and unhealthy, and lastly it leads to numerous health complications that can cripple, disable, and all-too-often KILL you at an early age! Obesity is nothing to trifle with. I hope you get your weight down, and fast. For your sake. Good day
bradley5055 0
@10 lol so true lol that sucks but as both a man and a person who is 6feet tall and weights 135lbs i cant say that itll happen to me anytime soon
hahaha7 0
maybe you shouldn't f-ing smoke. that's disgusting
BeautyAndBrains 0
Everyone telling her to lose weight is skinny and has never been fat. You have no idea what being fat is like, and you have no idea the emotional effects of telling someone that they are fat. It is not your job to tell people that they need to lose weight. Not everyone can be a health nut. And how do you know she isn't trying to lose some weight? A lot of overweight people work out all the time, they just haven't made it to their goal weight yet. So just shut up.
brianjman14 23
I like you.
smartalek 2
oh please. "you don't know what being fat is like!" damn right we don't! wanna know why? cuz we EXERCISE. ITS NOT HARD. its called eating healthy. that's not hard either everyone needs to stop saying "its alright to be fat!" because its not! its a health f*ckin hazard! as is smoking. so no. there is a problem with being fat. your fat a pig a slob. and yes, im skinny as hell. and proud of it.
alex_vik 1
#43 - I told her to lose weight, and I lost mine, so I know it all. I used to be 10-20 pounds overweight, and once I started exercising, all that weight just left me.