Today, I was standing on a balcony smoking a cigarette when I noticed a woman giving me strange looks. When I put the cigarette out and went to walk inside she said "You shouldn't smoke while you're pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a stranger had a go at me for smoking while pregnant. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
Today, I had to explain to my pregnant friend that her plan to get drunk and get a tattoo needed to wait at least 8 months. She then went out for a smoke to calm down. FML
Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
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Top comments
OperationNicole_fml 0
Well, at least you won't ever stand on a bus.
Xinxinix 0
Think of it this way, if you look like you're pregnant, you can get away with more stuff. Like yelling at people through the Drive-Thru at McDonalds or something.
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Comments (114)
okor 3
hah, fatty
ohboyscott 0
Anyone telling smokers not to smoke needs to shut the **** up. No smoker is going to tell you how to live your life. Everyone knows that smoking is bad for you, you're not doing the world a favor whining about someone's personal choice. **** off.
Raddaya 3
Personal choice? When it's my business, because I'M getting affected by the smoking, and so is every other ******* person, I have every right to tell them to stop smoking. Cigarettes should be banned, plain and simple.
commonsense31 0
#19 your a completely narrow minded retard and I bet you've never even tried smoking so you really don't know that lifestyle
artanis_neravar 0
@56, you know why smokers dont tell us how to live our lives because not smoking isnt hurting them
tincan 0
too much McDonald's.
Tehalon 0
fmylife.com seems to be filled with fatties! Lose weight!
krisxing 1
When I was in 4th grade, a 2nd grader on the school bus asked me if I was pregnant. I feel your pain.
whbdavis 0
okay everyone saying you need to lose weight, that is not necessarily true. I have a very healthy weight and I have a kidney disease and my kidneys are enlarged and wrap around to my stomach and make it stick out. That being said, my stomach is way larger in proportion to the rest of my body and I was 16 the first time I was asked if I was pregnant. Now, 5 years later and I am at 11 times that I can remember and have written down. It's not always about weight. I feel your pain, and I know how bad it hurts. Just be glad that has only happened once. It doesn't hurt any less even the 100th time around. :-/
whbdavis 0
Polycystic Kidney Disease -- There is no cure, but there is a clinical trial going on right now for a possible one or to at least slow down the progession of it. Most people are diagnosed by a renal ultrasound, and most people don't have pain with it and only find out when its too late and are having renal failure.
whbdavis 0
Polycystic Kidney Disease -- There is no cure, but there is a clinical trial going on right now to test a drug that might slow the progression of it! Most people are diagnosed by a renal ultrasound, but a lot of people don't have pain and won't find out until they are in the hospital for renal failure and by then its too late. Have your friend talk to a doctor if that sounds like it -- better to know then to find out when its too late!