Today, I was called into my son's school because he had got into a fist-fight with another pupil and I had to take him home. He clammed up about the reason behind the fight, until I finally managed to coax it out of him: the other kid is in "Hufflepuff" and he's in "Ravenclaw." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML
Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML
Today, I finally stood up for myself and beat the crap out of a bully at school, as my father told me to do. The kid and I were called to the principal's office, along with our parents. Inside my father's smirk faded when he saw that the kid's mom was his boss. FML
Today, my 14 year-old got a 5-day suspension for fighting. He stood up for an 7th grader who was getting picked on. While the poor kid was eating lunch, they were messing with him when my son stepped in. There were some words said, then a fight. He feels terrible for fighting but I think he was in the right. FML
Today, I got my ass beat by some kid in my grade. The reason I was targeted? The superintendent, aka my idiot father, suspended him for defending himself in another fight. The kid told me it's not personal, he needed to prove a point that our school doesn't do shit about bullying, As much as I agree with him… FML
Today, after picking up my 6 year-old from school, he said, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me. We got home, I looked up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in junior high. FML
Today, I found out there's a Harry Potter club at my school. My boyfriend is in it. FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML
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Top comments
SweetAsHell 9
I don't think the kid is really in Hufflepuff, that house doesn't seem like the type to fight. I think he's hiding his Slytherin ways.
ambowew 7
The kids don't pick what house they're in, that's the Sorting Hats job.
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Comments (287)
YayFlameWarz 9
Could he have at least picked one of the good houses?
gc327072 31
This belongs on mlia.
ambowew 7
The kids don't pick what house they're in, that's the Sorting Hats job.
captainburke 5
Harry did. He asked the sorting hat to put him in gryffindor, remember?
ambowew 7
But that's because he would have fit either Gryffindor or Slytherin. #1 is obviously insinuating that the ravens and badgers are the 'shit houses'. What if he only fit into those two? He can't very well say 'I'm a ******* snake!', so put me there! Although he obviously is meant to be one.
swankmrpancake 8
Actually he asked not to be put in slytherin (sorry if that's spelt wrong)
CoolBroStory 7
Thumbs down all you want but am I the only one sick of these hardcore Harry Potter fans? The series is good but it's not that serious.
captainburke 5
Well technically he asked the sorting hat not to put him in slytherin... But you find out that he is a true gryffindor...
LMFAOwned 9
22, you spelled slytherin correctly but "spelled" incorrectly. Gotta love irony... On a related note, I think that this is a worthy reason of a fight... Lol.
TheMathMajor 26
I actually think ravenclaw and hufflepuf are the better houses, but that's because I identify with them more.
walmartpaysme 15
All the houses are equally good. Each house has students with a certain set of qualities. They are different but equal.
DanielT1994 19
31-Spelt is correct.
Welshite 40
Dear god! It's a fictional series, people. There is no reason for people to associate and have actual rivalries based on loyalty to imaginary "houses".
TheMathMajor 26
47, no reason for people to associate with book characters? What's the fun in that? Fiction writers make their characters relatable on purpose.
walmartpaysme 15
47 they are kids. Kids are encouraged to use their imagination. I agree the fight was uncalled for though.
cupcakesbitch 0
Screw you I'm in Ravenclaw
CallMeMcFeelii 14
24 - I don't mind the Harry Potter fan club haha. I'm just so happy I haven't heard of "bronies" in while.
desireev 18
I don't know about you guys, but I would hope to be placed in Gryffindor. Professor McGonnagall is a bad ass bitch!
doctorhook86 25
Fighting doesn't sound very wise; I think the OP's son should reconsider his membership in Ravenclaw.
stephanie8sasha 4
What the HELL is a Hufflepuff???
DrDilllonReese 12
Let's be honest, if the sorting hat asked to put me in Hufflepuff I'd ask to be changed solely because of the name. Ravenclaw has the most badass name in my opinion.
heygirlie777 21
65-I'm Hufflepuff. Does that mean we need to get into a fist fight like OP's son? ;)
spiritfang11237 16
Ravenclaw is known for being clever. I think that is a good house. Next time he should just discreetly send over jinxes.
paijus 0
24 I think you mean it's not that Sirius..... >:]
turdontoast 8
**** you. I'm a Hufflepuff.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
66- What's wrong with bronies? MLP is a good show, with good messages. Plus the ponies are cute :3 By the way, I'm a girl, and I consider myself a Brony. The term is, in fact, unisex, and I use it because I don't care for the term "pegasister."
reddawn1985 12
That's a good reason to start a fight.
283leis 8
YES AVPM reference!
magicman13 9
Slytherine till I die motherfuckers.
xZoeAmethystx 12
Woah there, I'm a Ravenclaw. I even have a pillow.
Arrawyn 12
You're crazy! Ravenclaw is THE MOST BADASS HOUSE THERE IS. In order of awesomeness it goes: Ravenclaw Slytherin Gryffindor Hufflepufff
dead247 13
I shall know the book by the end of the day. please continue.
cheekyterier 13
guys.. #87 's comment was an A Very Potter Musical reference, not an insult.
kumonsucks 7
Spelt is past tense lol
wiredream 0
I'm not sure what a hufflepuff is but I hear they're good at finding things.
Blacksabbath211 9
Gryffindor! Come on OP, you couldn't have taught him about the best house? Also, there's no reason to fight with hufflepuffs. They don't do much, kinda like perry the platypus (not agent P though >:) ) now, Slytherin, on the other hand....
Dixbfloppin 11
Gotta love Harry Potter fan wars. :D
PhishloverA 14
31 he actually spelled 'spelled' correctly
sirsquab 12
I don't get why that's a cause to fight. Griffindor and Slytgerin sure, but Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff?
Boob_fml 6
And by definition of his own name, number 1 has succeeded in what he was so obviously trying to accomplish with his comment. Sheep.
924halle 8
SAME. I got it from Harry Potter World, and the guy that sold it to me was a Ravenclaw too :D and he glared at my sister for being a Hufflepuff
XSarahXSlytherin 7
Nobody asked your opinion, you muggle. -_-
Benchyface 11
Pfftt, overflowing with mudbloods here, no surprise you're all in houses that have proven themselves to be a shame for the wizarding world. *Snarl* For us purebloods, we're placed in the...clean house. *Roleplay over* Slytherin ftw, I even have a dark mark tattoo on my left wrist, because HP meant a lot to me while growing up~
symotomsofhope 5
Valid reason for argument.
science_nerd 5
Yeah but the sorting hate listens to what house you want
SwordOfTheSky 4
87 I think I'm the only one who got the reference lol
nerdness 2
Are you guys Sirus? Stop fighting or my father will hear about this!
kikihp731 16
You obviously don't understand.
mixedmessages 5
Actually, ravenclaw are clever not wise. Puzzles, maybe, ethical problems, go to hufflepuff
mixedmessages 5
Ur kind of an idiot. Dark marks are for death eaters, not slytherins
mixedmessages 5
Please be less stupid. Ravenclaw is the obvious best.
PaulB123 11
The principal used expelliarmus! (pardon my spelling)
LMFAOwned 9
Use wands, not fists!
JackeeDawn 9
My vote goes for the hufflepuff.
CheeseTron 15
Imagine the fights between slytherin and gryphindor (excuse my spelling)
P374RD3D 9
#2 I'm pretty sure you spelled it right
bigtaytay 13
I'm not even a Harry Potter fan but those kids are hardcore
DarkMarkInTheSky 9
61- gryphindor? Seriously? You couldn't just Google it?
DrDilllonReese 12
81- and you couldn't just go **** yourself? Get off his back.
mockingjaygirl16 8
finally some hope for this world!!!
DarkMarkInTheSky 9
91- Ooh 'go **** yourself' I'm SO hurt.
Xephyr 1
Just tell them to stop muggle dueling.
mduffy08 8
That's fifty points off ravenclaw and hufflepuff... But whomever won the fight will receive ONE HUNDRED POINTS!
AssassinsCRB 0
Ravenclaw is the best! Wit beyond measure is a mans greatest treasure :))))
mduffy08 8
159 - you seem a little mad?
mainlineloser 9
you spelled everything perfectly
seba7236 21
I hope the pun was intended? "Spelling"
SweetAsHell 9
I don't think the kid is really in Hufflepuff, that house doesn't seem like the type to fight. I think he's hiding his Slytherin ways.
onlychildFTW 34
I like how OP used the word pupil instead of student or kid or anything. Haha.
walmartpaysme 15
I think a hufflepuff would defend themselves if someone else started it.
bizarre_ftw 22
So the real question here is if the other kid is really in ravenclaw, I mean really, would a ravenclaw be so thick as to start a common fist fight instead of using some sort of clever trickery to **** with hufflepuff long term? I think the sorting hat screwed up here
juggalo54 3
Yeah, that's what I was thinking too... Now if they'd been gryffindor and slytherin I'd have no problem believing it, but hufflepuff and ravenclaw? Doesn't seem all too likely. Also, go ravenclaw!
irishpassion16 6
I bet all the potter heads like myself just had their day made by your comment.
WeaselBee42 6
Being a hufflepuff doesn't mean you're all cute and cuddly and full of sunshine and rainbows, it means that they're loyal, hardworking and particularly good finders. This kid is loyal to his house obviously. Anyway, hufflepuffs can be badass too; just look at tonks
hoppingintrees 1
All I know is, I'm in hufflepuff... And I would have probably defended my house. During the battle of hogwarts more ravenclaw students ran from the fight (or joined the dark side) than Hufflepuff. In fact, hufflepuff's values aren't to far from gryffindor's.
birdcagereligion 10
I like Hufflepuffs though. They're nice.
CaptainDoorknob 7
The best part is the kid's probably older than 15. I mean is it the same kid who tried to bite his classmates claiming he's on bath salts?
faithxoxox 1
"What the hell's a Hufflepuff?"
misshelena129 10
Hufflepuff's are particularly good finders!
ArielTheMermaid 17
Pigfarts, Pigfarts, here I come!
20PercentCooler 8
Pigfarts, Pigfarts, yum yum yum :D
ArielTheMermaid 17
I can't go I Pigfarts, it's on MARS! :D
20PercentCooler 8
Gotta love StarKid ;)
lenor_fml 7
They're also good finders
Xephyr 1
Edit: was beaten to it. Dang.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I got hit in the face for saying 'Daniel Radcliffe' instead of 'Harry Potter' once.
ebonyirony 29
He's going to write a book called "I'm not Harry Potter. " then, he'll later release "I am Harry Potter", just like Leonard Nimoy.
ambowew 7
Crucio the shit out of him. That'll make him learn the error of his ways. I don't blame him, though. The Hufflepuff was most likely a Mudblood.
walmartpaysme 15
That is a forbidden curse!
MaliciousMel 1
I am a Slytherin and I approve this message
S7YX 9
I'm a Dementor and i'm going to give you the kiss of death.
klovely22 13
How could you possibly be mad? I think it's quite funny.
bananagrams 9
She could be mad because her kid got into a fight at school
LiesAndMischief 4
Sounds more like Slytherin behavior to me. Tsk, your son is putting the good Ravenclaw name to shame, OP. FYL.
ToBeAnnounced 2
At least it wasn't over who's team Jaco or team Edward.
TBelle4Ever 15
Uh-oh, here come the twihards! I would run if I were you, but I feel the same as you!
ambowew 7
In that case, go for team Buffy. Hopefully she'll slay them all!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Go team **** Twilight!
gummy_bears1492 0
Go team Guy Who Tried To Hit Bella With A Car!!!
Tragichero92 12
I believe it was with a truck. Then again, maybe the book's version and the movie's version of that scene are different. Correct me if I am wrong.
Jaxx66 21
15- Buffy is a mere mortal. I am on team Armand, he'd beat the crap out of all of them. Plus he's sexy....
ambowew 7
I thought it was a van in the book. Can't be totally sure, though. That ******* read made my brain bleed. Maybe you should assassinate all of the Cullens like you did your clan, Itachi. I'd approve that shit, and I won't spend my whole life training to hunt you down for revenge. You're good to go!
gummy_bears1492 0
I think it was a van..oops! I just wish he had succeeded so we wouldn't have to live through 3 more tasteless books, 5 movies, and twilight fans!
Tragichero92 12
@ 118, Thank you. I've already started a hunting clan with Blade and Buffy. Anyone is welcome to join : ) * incinerated Edward with Amaterasu *
walmartpaysme 15
If you don't like the books or movies don't read/watch them and quit bashing on people that do.
LiesAndMischief 4
Personally, I'm a Slytherpuff. If I had to pick one, though, it would definitely be Hufflepuff. I'm really not brave at all, so no Gryffindor for me. xD