Today, I was standing on a balcony smoking a cigarette when I noticed a woman giving me strange looks. When I put the cigarette out and went to walk inside she said "You shouldn't smoke while you're pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a stranger had a go at me for smoking while pregnant. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
Today, I had to explain to my pregnant friend that her plan to get drunk and get a tattoo needed to wait at least 8 months. She then went out for a smoke to calm down. FML
Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
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Top comments
OperationNicole_fml 0
Well, at least you won't ever stand on a bus.
Xinxinix 0
Think of it this way, if you look like you're pregnant, you can get away with more stuff. Like yelling at people through the Drive-Thru at McDonalds or something.
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Comments (114)
koalaberry18 0
ouch...try 10 minutes of crunches 5 times a week...it's NO real exercise program, but it's a start.
OperationNicole_fml 0
I weighed 140 lbs and am 5'7'' (which is pretty darn average), and at that weight I looked pregnant wearing certain empire-waisted dresses. So to everyone that's telling her to lose weight, get a grip.
marinesgirl9 0
#9 i like that saying :P i've gotten this before, it doesn't matter if you're fat or not, i'm anything but fat, and i've been told i shouldn't smoke while pregnant. it's just this weird thing after i eat i get a tiny lil belly... i told the lady "I agree, it's a good thing i'm not" sorry, people are stupid :/
Tammerz 0
Wow, that does suck. It sounds like she was trying to be helpful though. Not that it's an excuse, it's like #9 said. If she said it rudely, you could have said, "You shouldn't talk while you're ugly!" or something (but less lame then that)...but only if she was really a jerk.
Werdoop 0
If you don't want to be fat then lose some weight, quit complaining about it when you could be changing it, nuff said.
oyster42 0
Some clothes, no matter HOW skinny the person wearing them is, will make the wearer look pregnant. I'm sure this girl is beautiful, except for the fact she was smoking.
Aethren 0
They were just stating teh obvious that one shouldn't smoke while pregnant. Mayhaps it is you that assumed the worst. Just for sake of devils advocate. Now had they said "You're pregnant, you shouldn't smoke" different story.
GubuntoidOSX 0
That's what you get for being a smoker. Sorry, but smoking just pisses me off. If you were doing something less RETARDED, I would say your life sucks.
VexVisnu 0
I'm with 13 and 17. Some clothing just makes people look fatter than they are.
Megbo 0
#1. Hilarious.