Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML
Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML
Today, I noticed a rather small man being harassed by a rather large man, so I tried to help out and break it up. The small guy punched me in the face and said, "Mind your business!" The large guy laughed and fist-bumped him. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
namezox 0
wtf.. why would you do that.
Maxine17 8
You should have said something like "Excuse me, you have something on your face" You don't touch strangers unless you have had at least 50cl of vodka.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (149)
yeahreally 6
lol idk why but the "to punch me in the face. Repeatedly" was hilarious. but nowadays you dont touch anybody nor look at them in any way cause there are waaayyy to many people who might start shit with you. Like the guy who beat your face for barely doing anything to him. Or you could have stared and he would have asked you what you were staring at and beat your face lol
Rebecca1993 0
If you were a guy and another guy started touching your face you wouldn't hit him? Or at least try to get him off? heck i'd do that an I'm a girl. lol
FerrariCake 2
Maybe he thought you were challenging him to a fight to the death. Lucky for you he didn't have a tray.
lucey15 0
he would hack at your neck with the sharp bit
FerrariCake 2
exactly... just sad that no one but the two of us know what the hell we're talking about. They're really missing out.
ForShame 0
Do you know who I am?
BritishHobo 0
What did you expect? 'Huh, this random guy just SLAPPED my face. Must've been a fly! Have a coffee on me!'
aback 5
You thought he was going to soul-kiss you? Some guy comes up and smacks you in the face and what do YOU do? Give him your phone number and ask him to call you? Jesus. Think before you go touching strangers.
Cassandrarox 0
You know u could have just told him that there was a bug on his face. YDI
pinkkloverr 0
if you had the guts to touch his face... then i'm sure you had the guts to say "hey, i wanted to let you know there's a bug on your face." let him deal with it.
The_Nothing 0
Dude if it's a person you don't know just tell them there's a bug. Of course you got hit, he had no idea who you were or why you smacked him in the face. Jeez, I didn't know people were that stupid.
thighsofglory 0
Welcome to Northern California. They're all like that.
janise 2
I wonder how many times the guy hit him. Was it once or twice or until he lost consciousness?
ArtistsSunshine2 0
I think that if you were a girl, it would be a bit different, but OP, YDI...
teiso_fml 0
OK, although that guy's reaction was WAAAY out of line, you don't just swat the faces of random strangers without their permission, whether or not they have a bug on it. What you do is alert them to the fact that they have a bug on their face, or you might try scare the bug away, but you DON'T TOUCH THE PERSON'S FACE! Just try and imagine if someone came up and randomly swatted your face, and you had no idea why. You might think they were trying to start a fight, too.