MC
Canada
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
piliseep
Booze confused
Today, I realized that I accidentally said my phone number wrong when I was giving it to a really smart, cute guy with all the same interests as me that I met at a bar last night. I'd had a few drinks and had gotten the middle three digits mixed up. FML
3some? uh, no
Dominican Republic
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
mrdave
Canada
Today, I looked in my pocket for the phone number of a girl I met last night at a party. I remembered us talking and exchanging phone numbers. When I found the piece of paper, I discovered that instead of writing her number down, I had drunkenly written down my own. FML
Austin Franklin
United States
Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML
vcarder
Newton, United States
Party hard
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Anonymous
Piedmont, United States
Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML
Anonymous
Party animal
Today, I got this beautiful girl's number at a bar. After the night was over, I was pretty drunk and sent too many drunk Snapchats. When I'd sobered up, I deleted them. She asked why I deleted them, so I said because I was drunk and didn't remember what I sent. She hasn't messaged me back since. FML
Dave
Brookfield, United States
Fat chance
Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML
hugme101
Canada
Today, after a long time convincing my parents that my boyfriend is really a good guy, not only did he decide to come by the house completely drunk, but he also ended up trying to kiss my mom, thinking it was me. FML
wtf mom
Santa Cruz, United States
Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML
Top comments
Nyolia 11
Would you like a side of epic with that fail?
asianpandabear 0
That's gonna be one awkward phone call.
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Comments (139)
SpicyGrass 0
What a selfish person. Regretting giving your mother pleasure. Glad my kids actually give me the full experience without me even asking.
Wozuh 5
If your mom is a milf, I'm sure he won't mind.
emmarie002 0
hopefully your mom is hot and looking lol
UnderTheMoon 0
What happenned to the cry baby flicking her bean to her boyfriend FML?
xShannonxSammyx 7
How should we know?
zachherbert 10
Ohhh NOOOO
ryanst 7
I've seen you post this on like 5 different FMLs..
tr0llz0r 0
That's because it's what you'd call a "novelty account." In this case, it's what's-his-face from Family Guy (profile pic).
SherryA 15
Lmao.. Every time you say it I always laugh imagining him saying "Ohhh NOOOOO" :) It's great.
bubblesdafrog 0
It's T?bï with an "i". With an accent over the "i". And a little line over the "o" so you know it's a long vowel and not a short one. And sometimes I like to dot the "i" with a smiley face or something. Something to brighten the reader's day. :)
Wozuh 5
102- If I could put a 100x thumbs up I most definitely would.
mistakenGrace 9
Hahaha, she's gonna thank you for that later, I believe.
1958x 6
How can you be so drunk you don't remember or realize your own number?
funkyspacemonkey 0
She's a dingy dip wad
hannahlovesyouu 0
I wasn't that drunk dude, you have this hot guy who was hitting on you all night you moms number! eh haha not the best(:
crymore007 11
"Today I was so drunk..." you deserve it.
neongurl98 10
Niccceeee!