Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I know that I was in the wrong and will take responsibility for that. When the cop handed me my ticket, he asked me if I was smoking crack. I denied it because I don't do drugs. He asked me what that foul odor was. I was passing gas. FML
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time." He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML
Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML
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Top comments
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Congratulations, you're one of the biggest morons around here. That's quite a feat, considering the other contenders to the title. Unless you meant you were smoking 'something else' and just said tobacco out of hypocrisy, you're really stupid to think it's illegal to smoke, especially in your own car!!
WTSchool 0
You definitely deserved that one. =_=
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Comments (76)
IWABO2_ 0
Ouch. sucks for you!
JP1324 0
These idiots saying smoking is wrong and wrong to do while your driving by yourself are ridiculous. First off he's by himself not forcing it upon others so he should be able to do the pack at once for all it's worth. As far as driving and smoking I'm an officer and every officer pretty much goes on their computer, drive, and listen to their radios at once and they aren't breaking regulations but actually following them. Grow up.
Cinn_fml 23
Just because it isn't illegal doesn't make it right; distractions are never good whilst driving. So why would you purposefully distract yourself? I mean, listening to the radio is one thing, but using a computer or handheld phone etc starts to take it too far, because that tends to require you to divert your eyes and hands.
MonkeySpeaks 4
Just FYI. According to the automobile association the second leading cause of car crashes are caused by listening to/changing the radio/cd/mp3. Smoking is not listed. Talking to passengers is number 9. Teens are also more likely to get into an accident or drive recklessly.
RedPillSucks 33
The funny thing is that cars are designed with these distractions built in. Whether its the radio, CD player, MP3 player, GPS visual maps. They've got cup holders, vibrating seats.... OK, maybe vibrating seats can be pretty cool.
fyl4realJDH 0
seriously- GROW UP! you act like if you blink while driving, you'll spin out of control. you can multi-task and drive. ppl do it everyday! sometimes accedents happen and sometimes u can be ten and two, eyes on the road and can still have an accident! So grow up and live in the real world. ppl do other things and drive and make it where they are going safely a million times a day.
Cinn_fml 23
Maybe I'm just used to other people being incompetent on the roads then, the amount of stupid things I've seen where I'm surprised an accident hasn't occurred is way too high. I just don't get why you'd want to make it any more dangerous than you have to, and you can't deny that distractions add risk to driving. But like I've said before, that might just be me.
Person1233 13
You got a speeding ticket. FYL? No.
MonkeySpeaks 4
Its obviously not whacky tobaccy bc the OP said it was tobacco.
SweptAway 0
it might just be my state, but it's legal to smoke at any age, so his age wouldn't change anything, you just have to be at least 18 years to purchase cigarettes...
Undead1992 0
that cops a bitch. he got you with a tabacco charge
soulreaper12296 28
Did you not read the entire thing?
WannaBeActor1018 11
YDI that's not illegal I don't think so anyway =|
TheLetterZero 7
YDI for smoking. That is all.
studentwoes 2
You are incredibly stupid. When you are pulled over by a cop you never EVER EVER know why! My friend got charged for admitting to being on her cell phone when she was pulled over for speeding. NEVER ADMIT ANYTHING!
Geurge 3
Don't see why everyone is saying that smoking while driving should be illegal, it's not that big of a distraction, my uncle used to roll cigarettes while driving and he's never been in/caused an accident.
brianjman14 23
That's awesome that your uncle can do both. But that is one person. There's a lot of things that could distract people in a car, including smoking. If you actually can smoke and drive, that's cool, but probably a lot of others can't. I mean, like seriously, if you can't focus on two things at once, then just pull over and smoke, don't make an accident.
ImaginaryFoe 1
I really wish a mod could weigh in on whether this was submitted as something other than tobacco. That would clarify if this is a truly F'ed L. Either way it's a YDI. You shouldn't have been speeding. Then volunteering unsolicited information was frosting on your cake of stupid.