Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Probable cause
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I know that I was in the wrong and will take responsibility for that. When the cop handed me my ticket, he asked me if I was smoking crack. I denied it because I don't do drugs. He asked me what that foul odor was. I was passing gas. FML
Alexa, play "Tailights Fade" by Buffalo Tom
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Double down
Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML
Am I being detained?
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Chips
Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
High performance, high risk quipping
Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time." He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML
Shot
Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML
Top comments
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Congratulations, you're one of the biggest morons around here. That's quite a feat, considering the other contenders to the title. Unless you meant you were smoking 'something else' and just said tobacco out of hypocrisy, you're really stupid to think it's illegal to smoke, especially in your own car!!
WTSchool 0
You definitely deserved that one. =_=
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Comments (76)
mandypandypants 4
Since when is smoking and driving a crime? I can see if its marijuana but tobacco?!
chicster 0
it's illegal to smoke and driver here
nocanhaz 4
Op you idiot, it's inconsiderate drivers like you that make me sick. I hope next time you smoke and drive you go off the road into a tree, and accidentally swallow your cigarette.
Trace01m 11
You did the right thing. When a cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going" the correct answer is always, "NO"
at0micmin3r 23
YDI FOR VOLUNTEERING INFORMATION. NEVER, EVER VOLUNTEER INFORMATION. So what if he was smoking? That's his business. But don't go around broadcasting it to the po pos when they ask you. (Yes, I said PO POs. Deal with it.) A silver tongue is nice son, but silence is golden.
iTzDann 0
ydi for not asking what?
magic8ball88 0
I don't see how this is an fml? You could have admitted to something else like blowing through an intersection and he could be like "Really? Uhh no you were doing 10 over but thanks I'll tack that on too" Then you could say fml.
kel920 0
YDI What the cop did is called self incrimination. They cannot ask you what you did wrong. And they especially can't fine you for it. Since you admitted to smoking he couldn't legally fine you for it (if smoking while driving is illegal where you're from). And to all of you it IS illegal for anyone to possess cigarettes under the age of 18 it's called an MIP - minor in possession -
Columbia_fml 2
it's actually not illegal to smoke if you're under 18. You cannot buy cigarettes, and adults cannot buy cigarettes for you... but smoking them isn't actually a crime. it's a loophole, as long as you know about it and can say you "found them."
RedPillSucks 33
Sorry officer, I'm pretty sure the bank surveillance camera didn't see my face on account of the mask I was wearing, and I had shot out the camera as I walked in. OP, you must be pretty young not to realize you shouldn't divulge info when a cop asks a question.
geon_olam 17
do you have the right to remain silent? cuz im pretty sure i read about something like that somewhere...
playhouse 0
ewwww smoker
roobear 2
FML changes every drug to tobacco/cigarettes. OP was smoking MJ and admitted it to a cop who didn't know.