Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I know that I was in the wrong and will take responsibility for that. When the cop handed me my ticket, he asked me if I was smoking crack. I denied it because I don't do drugs. He asked me what that foul odor was. I was passing gas. FML
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time." He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML
Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Congratulations, you're one of the biggest morons around here. That's quite a feat, considering the other contenders to the title. Unless you meant you were smoking 'something else' and just said tobacco out of hypocrisy, you're really stupid to think it's illegal to smoke, especially in your own car!!
WTSchool 0
You definitely deserved that one. =_=
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (76)
sjmd15 0
I sweat to drunk I'm not god offimicer :) ahahahhaha
marceil 0
moemoemoe silly comment , dude weed is another beautiful life that you will never reach
macawcrazy 0
So I'm a total dork for reading all this crap, but you guys are hilarious! Arguing or "debating" over some stupid ass shit! lol
repoman51 3
cigarettes good
Rick_S 3
When a police officer asks you "Do you know why I pulled you over," the answer is ALWAYS "No, officer." Be polite, but don't admit to anything. It may not get you OUT of trouble, but it will keep you from getting INTO more trouble.
Hippie6 0
OK. 2 things. For 1 smoking in your car is definitely not illegal. Depending on where you live its not even illegal if ure under age. and for 2. DENY DENY DENY. Thats like the most important rule of life when it comes to authority. Have you never talked to a cop before? dumb ass.
Gosurori_Otaku 0
Maybe the OP recently moved to the States from a country like the UK where smoking and driving at the same time is illegal? That would explain the YDI-ness of the FML. OP still should've done the research, though.
hotshot0510 2
it's not illegal to smoke and drive in the UK.. it's just frowned upon. I think the problem with smoking while driving isn't the distraction or the looking away or whatever, it's what happens if you burn yourself on your cigarette? i.e. by dropping hot ash on your leg etc.. then you're likely to swerve or lose control of your car. that's what I think the danger is tbh.
Vanessabieber16 0
As long as u don't have underage children in ur car then ur fine
pare10 0
how was this "fml" even approved! gay