Today, I drank a ton of beers for my 25th birthday. My friends love to watch me open beer bottles with my teeth. I chipped both of my front uppers doing this. I'm no longer covered by my parents dental insurance because I'm 25 now. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I celebrated my 30th birthday by accidentally knocking my fiancée’s tooth out with her glass as she tried to a sip. FML
Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML
Today, I went to a cosmetic dentist and got a chip in my tooth filled in that I’d had since I was 7. I went out later and my friend jokingly hit my head against the table a few times to make fun of me showing off my teeth. He slipped. I fell. I now have 2 chipped teeth and a broken nose. FML
Today, I went out for a few drinks with some friends. All night, I kept smiling and showing off my newly brace-free teeth. Later on, one of my friends drunkly asked, "Why does she keep smiling? Her teeth are fucking jacked." FML
Today, for my 18th birthday, I went out to a club with my mate and I drank so much I ended up breaking my nose. I was there for an hour. FML
Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML
Today, I learnt that my tooth is cracking due to a crown that was put in this past October to prevent the previous crown from doing that. Cheers to an implant at 25 years old. FML
Today, at 28 years-old, I broke the first ever bone in my body. I broke a metacarpal in my hand by going down an inflatable waterside at a children's birthday party. FML
Today, I had to have emergency work done on my teeth after I seized in the shower and smashed my face into the tub. Apparently, the dental insurance I'd been paying for but had never used ended its coverage 4 days ago, because my job was no longer working with them. FML
Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML
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Top comments
folieadeux 0
Welcome to the adult world. It sucks. Maybe you won't be so stupid next time.
fmlplz 0
25 years old and you are screwed because you are no longer on your parents insurance? Opening beer bottles with your teeth? You sound like an OC brat.
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Comments (38)
folieadeux 0
Welcome to the adult world. It sucks. Maybe you won't be so stupid next time.
22cute 17
Yeah, your Mom probably told you 100 times this would happen. Nobody teaches like experience.
fmlplz 0
25 years old and you are screwed because you are no longer on your parents insurance? Opening beer bottles with your teeth? You sound like an OC brat.
SomeRussianGirl 3
Lmao my father does this and never Chips his teeth.
joobie 1
you didn't realize it might not be a great idea after you chipped the first one?
miamiFTW_ 0
maybe he chipped them at the same time. smartass
freddie_fml 0
I weep for the future.
greenman_fml 0
it's all good man; maybe you can take to the streets with your special, unique talent and make some money off of it! that way you can pay for dental insurance.
ZING_MASTER 0
You ******* idiot.
Seegtease 0
Teeth beer opening isn't impressive, and just makes you look like a redneck. Fail.
neujersey 0
dude, COBRA, you got 60 days to sign up
ZING_MASTER 0
Moron.
down2earth2c 0
oh my god im so sorry about your teeth but that story totally made me laugh and laugh and laugh. i feel so happy laying in bed alone right now.... hahhahahhahah but damn that sucks man im sorry