Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML
Thorn in my side
Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML
Today, I was helping some neighbors corral and tag their cattle. Deciding to take a break, I turned my back to all 3 men and jumped down from an old, rusty gate. Luckily, the sharp piece of metal sticking out of it barely missed my skin. Instead it tore off the ass of both my pants and undies. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML
Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML
Today, I woke up to large spot of blood in my underwear. This wouldn't be too big a deal if I didn't have a penis. FML
Alexa, play "Fast Cars" by Buzzcocks
Today, I was sent to the hospital after being hit by a car while on my bicycle. The police officer said it was my fault for not looking, even though the car pulled up without looking. I now have a small herniated disc in my neck and abrasions on my thigh. FML
I want to ride my bicycle
Today, I went to the drugstore on my bike. The chain came off, the pedal punctured the top of my foot and I was bleeding a lot. To add insult to injury, the ATM inside was broken. I got gauze instead of the cash I came for. FML
Top comments
wordly 0
Ouch! Bad scene. YDI a little bit for not seeing that coming when you rode without a seat.
paks7 0
umm....use a seat cover?? why the hell would you ride a bike without a seat?
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Comments (181)
Wojciechowski 0
Why the **** are all these comments buried?
may_cause_fail 0
That a was dumb thing to do. And I guess you'd want a male doctor since they might be more understanding? But if you're gonna do stupid things, be prepared to take the consequences. :D YDI. Also why the hell is every single comment buried? D: Did someone just get bored?
AlexZB 0
i can't believe that you are embarressed that there are no male doctors. WHO CARES!
Suekoff16 3
Are you kidding me??? I'd RATHER have the female doctor doing that for me. That could result in a happy ending for you. so FYL for not tihnking of that in the first place.
Orangeman69 0
are you gay? id rather have chicks messin with my dick that guys. FYL for being gay.
abcdefghiloveyou 0
Being gay is bad, why?
ssnickel 0
Doctors are not there for a sexual experience. They are MEDICAL professionals. Doctors don't "mess with your dick." People prefer doctors of their own gender for the same reason why some don't care. It's a medical procedure, and it's very clinical... nothing sexual about it.
AshleyRose784 0
Ahahaha, I'm so sorry
AAAAHHHH12 2
Damn, is everything pertaining to this particular FML spam? Shoot man.
Tim777 0
None of it is spam. Someone is just abusing they're FML account by down voting every comment.
pleasetryagain 0
I'm going to say YDI because you're more concerned with a female doctor seeing your junk than the fact that your scrotum got ******* STABBED.
bensitu 1
I prefer the term skewered. A metal rod skewered his ******* scrotum. Imagine my surprise to learn that OP is from Texas.
Lonely_Lez 0
Ok, the staff really need to figure out this "every comment is bad" glitch...
alex_vik 1
Holy shit, there's a lot of downvoted comments.