Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML
Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML
Today, I was helping some neighbors corral and tag their cattle. Deciding to take a break, I turned my back to all 3 men and jumped down from an old, rusty gate. Luckily, the sharp piece of metal sticking out of it barely missed my skin. Instead it tore off the ass of both my pants and undies. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML
Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML
Today, I woke up to large spot of blood in my underwear. This wouldn't be too big a deal if I didn't have a penis. FML
Today, I was sent to the hospital after being hit by a car while on my bicycle. The police officer said it was my fault for not looking, even though the car pulled up without looking. I now have a small herniated disc in my neck and abrasions on my thigh. FML
Today, I went to the drugstore on my bike. The chain came off, the pedal punctured the top of my foot and I was bleeding a lot. To add insult to injury, the ATM inside was broken. I got gauze instead of the cash I came for. FML
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Top comments
wordly 0
Ouch! Bad scene. YDI a little bit for not seeing that coming when you rode without a seat.
paks7 0
umm....use a seat cover?? why the hell would you ride a bike without a seat?
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Comments (181)
mattmag 0
Is FML getting raided by /b/ or something?
Atropos_fml 0
This is beyond ridiculous. I vote take this feature away.
singachic87 0
I bet it's vdrummer7 since his comments are irrelevant and are continuously buried in each thread.
sadistmonkey 19
yeah, it's a useless feature to begin with
isthisonetaken 0
that sucks dude. about the nuts anyway. you should be glad there were no male doctors. nothing wrong with a female rubbing up on your balls. unless your gay. and whoever burried all the comments is a bitch.
maria12_fml 0
Um, is there a right way to hit a curb?
juggs_bunny_91 0
Be glad they didn't fall out! maybe next if u don't want a seat wear a cup!
staringatnothing 0
wow all these have too many negative comments
xxXChiiXxx 2
WHY ARE ALL THE COMMENTS BLOCKED!?!?
dyld921 2
He wants male doctors so they can sympathize with him easier. Duh. That doesn't make him gay.
baileys82 0
only if he enjoyed it
dyld921 2
I doubt anyone would enjoy having his balls stitched.
koda_fml 0
I think that's a good thing..
EpicGuy 0
I agree with #125