Today, I learned the joy of getting a brand new leather jacket and then watching my date drunkenly throw up all over my arm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML
Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML
Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over him. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Today, my boyfriend borrowed my Jane Norman dress to wear to a Halloween party. He got hammered, threw up all over it, and fell unconscious on the shower floor. FML
Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML
Today, I went on the best date of my life with someone I’ve admired for a very long time. On the car ride home, she vomited all over my lap and informed me that she’s moving across the country next week. FML
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Top comments
HanBanana15 9
Isn't one of the perks of leather the fact that everything wipes right off? My family had leather couches for years and the only thing we couldn't get off was sharpie. So unless she ate a sharpie beforehand, I'm not really seeing how the new leather jacket is relevant here.
Bliepje 22
Good thing its leather. Goes right off. Easy to clean
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Comments (4)
Bliepje 22
Good thing its leather. Goes right off. Easy to clean
HanBanana15 9
Isn't one of the perks of leather the fact that everything wipes right off? My family had leather couches for years and the only thing we couldn't get off was sharpie. So unless she ate a sharpie beforehand, I'm not really seeing how the new leather jacket is relevant here.
RichardPencil 32
What a tricky way to carry out his vegan agenda! I'll bet PETA is paying for his next six-pack.
WeirdUS 30
Problem is vomit can eat through table varnish and can easily damage a surface. I hope OP was able to get the jacket clean and their was no second date