Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I put on a new pair of jeans and went out. Halfway through my errands, I realized the long sticker with my size was still on the back. I walked around for quite a while advertising my embarrassing waist and leg measurements. FML
Today, I returned home to my girlfriend after being away for 6 weeks of work. I decided to take a shower and change before having a nice dinner with her. Without looking I grabbed a random pair of jeans from my closet to put on. They were Levis. I don't own or wear any Levis. FML
Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML
Today, my boyfriend got a job at a trendy clothing store in the mall. Trying to be supportive, I went to visit him and tried something on. I got stuck in the jeans and had to call my boyfriend, who sent the manager to pull the jeans off me. FML
Today, I was trying on jeans in a store. Thinking the changing room door was locked, I stripped down to my underwear. Suddenly, an elderly woman opened the door, stepped in, and said, “Oh, I thought this was the toilet.” We locked eyes for an eternity before she backed out. I felt obligated to buy the jeans to regain some control of my life. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to get her new clothes. She's gone from a size 4 to a size 12 during our relationship. FML
Today, I was trying on some new pants in the fitting room at a store. I was so overcome with joy when I noticed that I had dropped two pant sizes, that when I took them off and went outside to pay for them, I realized I forgot to put back on my original jeans. FML
Today, I was in a hurry to get to work and I put on yesterday's jeans. While at my meeting an employee asked me if 'that' was mine and pointed to something on the floor next to me. Which was yesterday's underwear. FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML
Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML
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Top comments
georgia_fml 0
I'd go shove it on her chest. Oh well, she sounds funny :P
Chaith 16
Make your way to electronics in the nearest department store.. swipe a kiddy game for $7.99 or so.. Next time you see her with a low cut top, put the 'Early Childhood' sticker between. Lolol
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Comments (180)
Hanagumo 0
time to ditch her!
MR_OHCRAP 0
.
lmmmr 0
What is with the "I can't take a joke" FMLs lately?
SpitFyre 0
Seriously. Get a sense of humor.
divineinstrument 2
Actually a lot of FMLs are posted for the comedic value, so it's possible that the OP found this funny... I know I did!
chinolatino 0
@#78 Funny is My Life, anyone?
theweirdshipper 0
Go Yoda. And that dude's girlfriend!
curryndricegirll 0
haha. obviously she has a sense of humor.
dowhatiwant 0
did any of you saying get a sense of humor consider that it's probably not an FML because his girlfriend made a joke, but because he has a small dick?
bbobe900000 0
I agree with #78. by the way... burying #19's comment? really?????? I am just amazed that people actually think there is a reason to bury that. Oh no. He put a dot. Time to bury. lol really people
nutbiscuit 0
lol she sounds like a character, keep her, need more girls with a sense of humour
cactus_fml 0
Hahahahahahaha, nice.
fudgesicle 6
I would have done the same thing.
8trickster8 0
Ahahahah she sounds awesome
Ana_Aryani 0
******* A! She sounds like the biggest champ :D
georgia_fml 0
I'd go shove it on her chest. Oh well, she sounds funny :P
timtam24 0
hahaha it was a joke (or so i assume) don't worry about it
fudgesicle 6
I'd worry
Chaith 16
Make your way to electronics in the nearest department store.. swipe a kiddy game for $7.99 or so.. Next time you see her with a low cut top, put the 'Early Childhood' sticker between. Lolol
metheonlyb 17
You Win #6!!
blueworld_fml 0
Yes! or anything with "TRAINER" on it...
DameGreyWulf 1
YES! Perfect. Seriously, I do hope this was a joke, because... I have recently discovered most women have no idea what the hell a "small" penis is. They think their giant ****** are accurate depictions of dicks.
jumpman3000 0
GENIUS
Quid_Pro_Quo 1
That's one of the reasons I don't want to use any. Especially before I even try a real one, I don't want to spoil the first experience.
GreenDaysGeekGrl 0
LMAO
sireen 0
are guys THAT sensitive about their penis size? she was kidding.
Faced159 0
lololol you're great. Also... What guy wears x-small pants? OP must be emo... possibly because of his small penis. :D
cyxx 0
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHA!! Please ask her if we can be best friends.
growingupnextmon 3
Yes.
metheonlyb 17
Yes We Are!!! Thats the thing that makes us Guys right?? It is verrrrrrry important for us.
cogburca 0
yes.... my boyfriend's "short" so when i tell him he's a "small guy" he takes it super offensively. guys are waaaaay too sensitive, but i guess that's what makes them guys!
nocomment21 0
i'm curious, what's the end of this quote?
cheeter 0
yeah exactly!!! And boys deserve to bitch after all this time! Equal rights!!
Chasted 0
A guys penis is a womans weight/age/wrinkles/whatever.
maddog_fml 0
@#9 So why do women get boob jobs?? If the OP had said that his gf had small ****, she def had post an FML.
Alexgoesfml 3
Seriously, girls shouldn't kick us in the crotch to teach some of us a lesson, just tell the guys they have a small penis. It will shut them up forever. It shows how pathetic some guys man-ego are.
jet_fml 0
not necessarily. some of us like being smaller :)
DrAwesome 6
#79, wake up, honey. You've been talking in your sleep this whole time. Reality's a-knockin'.
bsias4ever 0
haha good luck with that...YOU FAILA
voodootrucker 0
bullshit do you buy jeans at the dollar store don't think i ever saw jeans not sold in number sizes
hebron77 0
Or it could just be another designation besides the number. I know I've seen alot of clothes like that.