Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The officer was nice and let me off with just a warning. That is, until my dipshit brother yelled "Fucking pig!" out the window as the officer walked back to his car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML
Today, my brother found out that getting pulled over is technically getting arrested. Almost on cue, we got pulled over because my dad doesn't realize that "stop at a Stop sign" doesn't mean "slow down to a crawl, then go." My brother then started yelling, "WE'RE BEING ARRESTED!" At least the cop thought it was funny. FML
Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding and got a $200 ticket. After I pulled away, I decided to warn the next car about the cop up ahead by flashing my headlights. The next car was another cop. He didn't appreciate my "help". FML
Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner, I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML
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Top comments
bredahl 26
Make your brother pay for the ticket.
JustForRetorts 13
What the hell was going through his mind to make such a dumbass remark??
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Comments (78)
bredahl 26
Make your brother pay for the ticket.
slackerjoe 22
actually, I think that had he immediately and harshly dealt with his brothers insolence, the cop may have let it slide.
184886837272837 32
since OP was driving his brother around I'm assuming he's a young driver. For a young driver you can get less demerit points before you lose your license which makes the points you get for speeding a much harsher punishment than the fine. While OP can make his brother pay for the ticket he can't do anything about the demerit points which are the real killer.
ChristianH39 30
I would've kicked my brother out of the car on the spot. Also how the hell do you remember that username, 41?
184886837272837 32
@64 if you look closely it's actually a pattern
GreatGeak 8
@87 I stared at this forever. I wanted to be THAT GUY that figuted it out and then explained the pattern. I like to think myself remotely intelligent. I see nothing but random numbers and possibly segments of patterns.
184886837272837 32
that's because there is no pattern, I just tell everyone who asks that there is one and watch them struggle to find it.
GreatGeak 8
@90 O.o I have this insane level of...distaste for you right now. although I'm glad you told me.btw I've determined that 5 is missing from that "pattern". 1 and 4 = 5 however (the 1st and 2nd letter). and if numbers were letters, it spells AHDHHFHCGEGBHCG. AND this still begs the question how do you remember it.
184886837272837 32
I write it down...
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
91 - I read it once and gave up.
cherokeecutie 13
^TOTALLY agreed. I would make him pay for it, even if it meant mowing lawns and doing chores to earn it.
JustForRetorts 13
What the hell was going through his mind to make such a dumbass remark??
foxwasalamb 24
absolutely nothing
skyeyez9 25
Indeed.
Mafia_ 16
One does not simply yell ******* PIG at a cop
BvbArmy_0 18
Maybe he was playing angry birds?
lnheritance 19
In this case the little piggy went 'we-we-wee all the way to an ass beating'.
PokemonMaster0 15
What mind?
ariiewilliams 17
Your brother is stupid.
MRP360 14
thats an understatement
cryssycakesx3 23
he deserved it for speeding in the first place.
RenoTheRhino 30
63, don't tell me you've never sped before.
REALAfroninga 11
Haha I speed all the time. Rural roads that stretch for 10-20 miles at 35mph??? Some with mile straights? Would you rather it take ten minutes to get to work, or an hour!
volcanes_jovenes 6
#69, from what i've seen, #63's posts shit as if she's a ******* angel. But if that had been my brother, he'd have been walking his happy ass home.
FrancesShiver 20
Hmm, I don't know if you deserved it for speeding, or if your life sucks because of your brother. I hope it wasn't too expensive, OP. ❤️
TheTragicTruth06 8
Well since OP got lucky with the cop letting him go, his brother ruined everything with his remark. I think it's more of a FYL than YDI
thesnowleopard 3
Por que no las dos? *mexican music*
TheNewGuy03 29
Well, if you didn't have a reason before, now is the time to lay the Smackdown on your brother.
emilyjgraham 34
I was thinking the same thing. Seriously OP, I gope you punched him square in the ******* face!
ChristianH39 30
I know if that was my brother I'd sell off his favorite video games to pay for the ticket
volcanes_jovenes 6
this is the best idea. i didn't think of that, he would cry like a baby if they somehow disappeared.
Meggston 17
Oh gosh, you need to smack the shit out of your brother. So, you got the fine, eh?
alicealiveordead 13
smooth bro, real smooth
TheTragicTruth06 8
These are those times when you want to say "Yea, he's adopted..." When people ask if he is your brother.
scouttrooper8 12
Brothers. Can't live with them
OysterPearls 33
Can't live without... No wait, you can. You definitely can.
davincidasecond 24
Well, my life wouldn't be as interesting without my brother, to be honest, as much as he pisses me off.
Omegapi197 12
Two words for your brother; bus pass.
Kamon97 23
Now I know this FML has been done before... Doesn't the staff read these?
kuso_fml 8
It's user moderated postings for the most part. It may be new to the newer moderators.