Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game, and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said, "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing Monopoly with my kids. It was fun, and led to some mock fights. My neighbor, who despises me for being a single mother, used it as an excuse to call the cops on me for "abusing" my kids. They were too confused to do anything but nod at the officer's accusing questions. FML
Today, I won a game of Monopoly against my girlfriend. She reacted by sweeping the board off the table, storming out the front door, and mowing down my mailbox driving away. FML
Today, my wife and I almost got a divorce over a game of Yahtzee. FML
Today, I was holding our weekly poker game with a few work buddies. My psychotic, live-in mother-in-law wasted no time jumping into the game, cheating me out of $150, my new wristwatch, and what little pride I had left. FML
Today, my wife said she wants a divorce. Three days ago, I added her onto the title to my house, my bank accounts, and my business. FML
Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML
Today, my new wife and I got home from our honeymoon, and not an hour later she'd sat me down for a talk, saying, "Now that you're married you've got to act the part and give up this silly nonsense," then banned me from seeing my friends, playing video games, and basically everything else I ever enjoyed. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to a family game night. Halfway through a game of Klingon Monopoly, my drunk parents started arguing because apparently, while my dad was in jail, he cheated on my mom with a Klingon whore. I doubt my girlfriend will ever visit again. FML
Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML
Today, my wife of seven years told me she wants a divorce because I'm boring. FML
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Top comments
Vidrill 22
Well, maybe if you wanted to keep playing, you should have put your foot down?
Cads1 24
Sounds like she needs to go directly to jail without passing go or collecting $200.
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Comments (86)
Jennandco 25
Should have got a prenup... But no, that was cruel of your wife. Don't let her treat you like that, talk to her afterwards in privacy
jqmalang 17
Well that's disrespectful..
ali282h 15
Chillax! don't see FML here unless the wife was serious, which is highly unlikely..
ali282h 15
Chillax!! I don't see an FML here, unless your wife was serious, which is highly unlikely.
tranced_ 45
Your wife is so hot! ?
Emmiii_fml 18
What?
laden_swallow09 35
Put down the pipe before you post, 15.
THEDARKLORDOFALL 17
In all fairness..it was a good joke and you were playing monopoly. That game is responsible for murders
phoenix3423 14
wow. you let that happen.. so many other ways.. starting over so she could be in on the fun..her waiting till game was done and starting over. no way any man woman or child should ever give up thier spot in a heated boardgame. Period. nope not my spot..not today..
chill99 15
I hate it when the person who you think should be your best friend does things for a laugh at your expense. Not funny at all.
marzipanh 9
Hope she doesn't mean it
X_KassidyRose_X 12
Why did you let her do it?