Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, my girlfriend has some bruises from her karate class. We went shopping together and needless to say, I got quite a few dirty looks. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the bed, when he started to tickle me. I tried to pull away but he pushed me back down. I ended up hitting my eye on the corner of the nightstand. His comment was "this is why you shouldn't struggle." FML
Today, after my girlfriend played a prank on me a few days ago, I thought she’d be a good sport about me playing one back. Turns out she’s not a good sport. I’m now single, with black bruises on my ribs. I think one might even be broken. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the couch. I got thirsty, so I got up and grabbed a metal water bottle and drank out of it. He tried to playfully touch it and spill water on me, but instead hit it hard enough to where it slammed my mouth, chipped my tooth, and cut open my lip. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I hit her. FML
Today, my girlfriend actually walked into a door and gave herself a black eye. She's too embarrassed to admit it, so she's telling everyone I beat her. FML
Today, I was playing tug of war with my dog. She let go and I ended up punching myself in the mouth. My lip is still swollen. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML
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Top comments
evilscorpi 29
better start heading to the gym more often
CHOMP3R 0
Never underestimate a woman.(:
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Comments (133)
reaper72404 3
You're the one who wanted her to beat you up in the other FML. Mission accomplished. I bet your friends think you're really tough now.
LolCakes111 7
Well next time, don't argue about wanting your Girlfriend to dye her hair your ex's colour. Jeez.
pondermuse 5
Is she a ninja? Or are you just a pussy?
MainPrism 16
You're a pussy & your girlfriends a psycho. Good luck with that...
Enigmax2514 7
Hey man you ever heard this saying: mess with the bull and you get the horn? You don't play with fire without expecting to get burnt, so quit your bitchy whining and either grow up or man up
elisabeth1_fml 0
One word 'pussy'
Jenglish17 0
Us ozzies are born from the fine ingredients of vinegar steak and multiculturalism :) such nice people we are
Skrillext 0
Aussies*
DeathBunny218 37
I'm not really sure what the problem is, would you prefer her to be injured rather than you?
QueenSaru 28
That was my impression too.
Cheylea 10
Girlfriend: 1 You: 0 Hmmmm, maybe take some Kung Fu? Might help. :)
yaneliz1994 16
Well we know who will defending who when something happens
QueenSaru 28
OP, I hope you dumped her ass faster than a hot potato. If you were playing around and doing your best not to actually hurt her, then there's no reason for her to have been so violent. Women shouldn't be able to get away with physical violence merely because they're women. And this is coming from a woman. People laughing and calling the OP a pussy for getting hurt are the main reason why men who are ACTUALLY suffering from domestic abuse rarely come forward. Congratulations assholes, you're helping to support domestic violence.
Skaw_fml 8
Intelligent life detected. Hard to find people that thinks: Man hitting a woman = Bad Woman hitting a man = Bad.
ReynshineCutting 10
It's not that hard to leave bruises when playing around. And if she accidentally caught him in the eye with her elbow, there's the black eye. My fiancé and I play wrestle a lot. I leave bruises on him all the time, but he bruises way easy. It takes a lot for me to bruise. If she got a little too rough (and that can easily happen when play wrestling) that's absolutely no reason to leave her. OP should just talk to her about it. If it continues or she blows him off, then sure he should leave, but a discussion is warranted first if they are at all emotionally invested in each other.
BjgUsername 12
It sounds like he didn't notice till the end and if it was domestic abuse it wouldn't have the word "play" in it, btw has any one ever herd of a guy getting the shit kicked out him by a girl
TheNewGuy03 29
Oh, all he had to do was get an underhook and and overhook, shrimp his legs out, and get his butterfly hooks...and voilà! Wait, what are we talking about here? |the kid|
reddawn85 8
It did say they were play-wrestling. I got a ladder if you need help down of that soapbox, though
QueenSaru 28
Playing or not (I can read you know) it's the fact that she laughed at hurting him that's not cool. If you accidentally blacked a friend's eye while fooling around, would you not still apologize? Accident or not? And the abuse comments are directed at the people telling him to suck it up, just because she's a girl. Girl or no, people should not intentionally hurt other people, that's all I meant.