Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Repetition
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML
What a Q-tip
Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML
Honky
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Actor's Studio
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Automaton
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Pick your moments, dude!
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Top comments
theneatoburrito 8
Well show him you enjoy making airplane sound effects as you leave the bedroom.
spike1994 2
You know what would really drive him wild? Shave a landing strip for him.
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Comments (116)
cappellaaa 23
bahaha that's awesome
jem970 19
Thank you 16 for making me laugh like crazy
DAN_THA_GR8 12
Cancel his flight ! Or Delay it till he grows up
colinwis 3
Don't be such a Wh@re.. Get to know him more and make him work for it or ur gunna be disappointed
JustAGirlOnFML 11
When he's about to enter, make a crashing sound and say, "Sorry, the plane has crashed. Sex will be cancelled today."
veet 2
Seriously get over your self
Inovermyhead12 1
I like to say banana poke while I enter I think it's funny watch Matt Williams pimp chronicles
trinityfagan 5
Dump him
heatheru 5
he is avoiding intimacy.
WcED 8
New boyfriend? how fast do you give it up?