Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "Wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!" Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't." FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML
Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML
Today, my friends decided it would be funny to give me a "hickey" with a vacuum cleaner while I was passed out drunk. Not only do I have to try and explain this to my girlfriend, but we're meeting her parents for lunch this afternoon. FML
Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
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Top comments
songstress4life 0
Wow... she didn't even kinda feel remorseful. Sorry, dude!
Shadowflames420 0
she still your girlfriend? wtf is wrong with you! dump her!
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Comments (115)
Gringo_fml 0
What u mean... I shave mine everyday U should have put itching powder all over her pussy
countrygal926 0
A burn from a curling iron can look like a hickey, unfortunately.
kennalusk 0
Do you curl your pubes?
fourwheelsoffury 0
If it wasn't a hickey then why would she say what she did? Her careless response makes it pretty obvious what she was up to.
surt 0
i hope you showed her the hickey on the back of your hand
TerAki 0
This is when people should be able to hire a Chris Brown of their own.
marz88 0
@ 32 Why the **** would anyone be curling any hair down there? We dont want it curled we want it gone..ish
bigcrazymike 6
You shoulda kicked her out without her clothes.
zoomster 0
I'm sorry you put your mouth down there, I hope you didn't catch anything! lol @ #15
abuu 0
haha who shaves there hips honestly? I dont think anyone? and why the heck would you wants your hair down there curlly
secret_fml 0
haha maybe it was a bruise?