Today, I was eating with my boyfriend and his family at a high-end restaurant when, suddenly, I screamed, thinking a dog had just bitten my leg. I am terrified of dogs. I kicked my under-the-table assailant as hard as I could. It was my boyfriend's adorable five-year-old sister. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML
Today, while I was cooking, my dogs were messing around behind me. I suddenly felt a painful bite on my ass cheek and instinctively kicked back. I then realized it was my 3-year-old daughter, who was laying on the floor crying with a nose bleed. FML
Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML
Today, my mom's super spoiled small demon dog attacked my 3 year-old daughter, mauling her leg. Out of instinct, I kicked it away, causing it to fly across the room yelping. I picked up my daughter and took her straight to the hospital, where she got stitches. Later that night, I was greeted with a vet bill. FML
Today, I got bitten by my aunt's dog. My brother was holding the leash. He said he didn't pull the dog away from me because he didn't want to rip my shirt. Meanwhile, the dog was biting a penny-sized chunk out of my hip. FML
Today, the family dog was in the garbage and wouldn't stop eating. He is a large dog, and I had to put my arms around him and pull him out of the trash can. Well, he bit me so hard I was bleeding. My whole family is siding with the dog and saying it was my fault for not letting him eat. FML
Today, a dog bit me, tearing a hole through my sweatpants, my shorts, and my underwear, all to get at the dog treat I'd hidden in my pocket. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML
Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML
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Top comments
Tehalon 0
You did a good job, kids should know its not polite to play under the table in a high-end restaurant. Do wonder why you would think a dog is walking around in a high-end restaurant...
CrimsonKnight 0
It'll teach her not to bite peoples legs or to crawl under tables when your out eating. It'll save her parents trying to teach her.
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Comments (284)
MackDaddyDess 0
The little sister deserved that kick, shouldnt have had her ass under the table at all. let alone biting people.
iwadasn 33
You completely deserve it, both for being stupid enough to think a dog would be in a high-end restaurant, and for kicking what you thought was a dog as hard as you could.
razzl3erry 6
You...you are kind of an idiot;;
nicholasj96 9
Why the **** she on the floor at a high end restaurant ?
ajh557 22
YDI for being scared of dogs
Shazam25 7
Why would you think there's a dog in a high-end restaurant? YDI for being a moron.
stretchedthin 20
I hope he broke up with you!
Ezellianna 14
Ouch!... But it's kind of hard to blame you. Why was she under the table anyway? And shouldn't she know it's not acceptable to bite people?
communisttaco 16
Couple of things... Why are you so damn terrified of dogs, and why would your dog theory make sense if you were in a restaurant
heythisisme02 9
Because some people bring dogs in. Like sight dogs. People have to reason to be afraid of dogs because my mom got bit by dog and now she doesn't go near any stranger dogs without knowing that they are ok. so yeah there is in this case an understandable portion for her to be afraid if she had a bad experience in life before then she might be afraid.
elizacandle 29
she was biting you? i think that'll teach her a lesson....