Today, I was cleaning out my new guinea pig cage for the first time because one of them had babies last night. After using a spatula to shovel up the 3 inch layer of crap and placenta, I decided to hose it down. The hose came on so hard, it sprayed the dung and birth water all over my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my beloved guinea pig has impaction. For the rest of his life it will be my duty to clean out his rectum manually every month, or every week/day if it gets worse. FML
Today, I was cleaning up rabbit pee from the floor when my rabbit hopped up to me. To prevent her from standing in it and spreading it throughout the room, I shooed her away. She got such a fright that she jumped in the pee and spattered it all over my clothes and face. FML
Today, I learnt that my guinea pig can shoot poop across the room like a tiny brown torpedo. How did I find this out? It landed in my coffee. It wasn't until after I'd finished my coffee that I noticed it. FML
Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
Today, I was elected to learn how to clean the birthing tub at the hospital I work at. Today, I also discovered that while blood doesn't bother me, floating chunks of afterbirth and god knows what else, will cause me to projectile vomit into said tub. Which I still had to clean afterwards. FML
Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML
Today, I went to a petting zoo with my niece and nephew. While we were checking out the llamas, one of them spat directly into my face. Disgusted and embarrassed, we turned away to pet a deer. The deer immediately urinated, then shook its tail, which splattered it into my face. FML
Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
catatonicsleep 17
3 inch layer of dirt, shouldn't you have cleaned them out a long time ago?
Penrhyn 0
A guinea pigs pregnancy is 65-72 days...if this was the first time you cleaned it since you got them then you definitely deserve it. Also, I notice you live in QLD...you do know that there are approximately 300+ guinea pigs languising in Australian Cavy Sanctuary shelters in QLD right? And many more in the NSW + Victorian shelters. If you bred on purpose then you really deserve it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (79)
FOAD 0
I have 2 guinea pigs, and i'm guessing she was talking about 3 inches of litter along with waste... 3 inches is a waste of litter btw... I usually leave mine about an inch thick so it smells sooner and reminds me to clean their cage more often. Also, guineas eat their afterbirth... unless she got one of those in-denial guinea pigs who end up being terrible mothers... Her guinea pig was probably pregnant before she got it. That's why you NEVER buy guinea pigs from a store, but if you have to, from a store that only carries 1 gender or the other. Even if there are seperate cages, there's a chance of mix ups...
RaeBabe03 0
Gross!!! :(:(:(:( Ew
aerosmihlikesme 0
That's what she said!!!
hawkloverr 0
I don't believe this. I watched my guinea pig give birth and she ate the stuff afterward. I'm pretty sure that's normal!
xmagicgirlxx 0
you deserve it, your not supposed to touch the mother or babies for 2 weeks. and its normal for them to eat the placenta.
Krabby_fml 0
Crybaby. Take a shower.
starshine3987 0
YDI for neglecting to clean out your pets cage for so long. You're supposed to clean their cage once a week and refresh their bedding a couple times between each cleaning. Also, most all rodent animals (hamsters, gerbils, ferrets, and guinea pigs) can easily be potty trained. I've done so with my four dwarf hamsters, it isn't that hard. Get it a litter box so it won't have to wallow around in its own mess anymore, especially if it now has babies. If you leave the feces in there long enough it will grow mold on it and make your pet very sick. I'm surprised it hasn't already. Also #47 is right. Most animals usually clean up the after birth, and you shouldn't disturb the babies so soon. However since that cage was clearly a health hazard to the mother and even more so the babies cleaning it probably was your best option.
starshine3987 0
I as afraid my comment would be to long if I included these with it. Here are some links to info about how to take care of your guinea pig. Please in the future take better care of it or your putting it's life, and the life of it's babies, in danger. http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/small-pet-care/guinea-pig-care.html http://www.petco.com/New-Pet/Small-Pets.aspx?N=26 http://www.2ndchance.info/guineapigcare.htm http://www.simplepetcare.com/pet-pets/8/GUINEAPIG/
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I had pet rats and got a rabbit sized litter box for their cage. They litter trained themselves the first night I had them and only had a few accidents after that. :)
shadowskater 0
dude YDI for animal neglect 3 inches of crap god i barely ever let mine go past 2 weeks without cleaning it. and it had offspring it takes a little over 2 months to have them. plus the few weeks it takes them to get used to each other
OnTheSaneSide 0
I had the same litter thing with Gerbils. It wasn't our last litter. Separate them while you still can!!
keki60 0
dick