Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML
Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML
Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
Today, during my shift as a vet nurse, I picked up a gorgeous cat for cuddles, only to discover it was covered with pee. And now I am too. I still have 4 hours of my shift. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, I started my first day at work. When I used the bathroom, I thought I was peeing into the bowl but it was actually leaking out. My pants kindly cleaned up the mess. FML
Today, I was changing a wound bandage on one of my patient’s buttocks. I forgot to initial and date the bandage per hospital regulation. As I kneeled in to write, the patient let out the biggest loudest fart directly in my face. The worst part? Some of it sprayed out, some on my face. FML
Today, it was my first day working as a dental assistant, leaving me in charge of all cleaning. The first patient was so scared, he peed his pants. Which might have been understandable if he hadn't been a fully grown man. FML
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
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Top comments
texas_justice 0
...strange excitement...
purplemnm 9
ydi, it's painful when you pull out the needle too fast, control your emotions woman!
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Comments (132)
texas_justice 0
...strange excitement...
ReallyMike 0
this
nmsm 1
Yeah, why would you get excited? Maybe nervous that it's your first time.
laurasawr 0
WHY on earth would you get excited over that?!
youALWAYSdeserve_fml 0
turns me on bro
Sonfang 19
so you get blood and pee on you...and the poor dog gets all the pain that goes with it! wow truely FYL...**sarcastically rolls eyes** maybe when you're old karma will pay you a visit and some new doctor/nurse will pull a tube out of you to damn fast and you'll bleed everywhere! Have a nice day your stupidity and excitement caused an innocent animal pain!
thor89 0
Is it a Bitch Female dog
thor89 0
Is it a Bitch Female dog
iCJ86 0
that sucks for the dog not u
chyeahbro 0
you deserve it for being excited after putting something in a dogs vag
futtgoredo 0
that sounded really weird "I was exited cause I got to put a urinary catheter on a dog!"
FMLFML123123 0
did it make you wet? you got "excited," sexually excited?
Gumblebum100 0
well this is an odd conversation but I agree that why in the world, take that back why in the UNIVERSE would you be excited to stick a tube in a dog's vag!! and why on earth would this fyl cuz I beleive it would be worse in the dogs position for many reasons than to be covered in bloody pee so before i think your life is ****** please get one first
infinitii 0
who gives a damn about you, I'm sure the dog didn't like having a catheter yanked out of it's crotch.
tweetbaby14 18
so you get turned on by shoving tubes in pee holes? animal pee holes at that then making them bleed... sadobeastialist
TuM_TuM 0
mmmmmmm fruit punch!!! i bet it was a little tangy...
myfriend_youfail 3
Gumblebum100, perhaps you haven't heard, but.....the urethra and the ****** are not the same hole. Durrrrr. Also, most people with careers are very excited when they get to do a task for the first time, especially a task they might not normally do. I started my internship just the other day, and I was quite excited that I'd get to draw and test a patient's blood for the first time. Practicing on oranges and doing labs on classmates only gets you so far...when you actually get to do it in the work environment for the first time, it's very exciting (and a bit nerve-wracking...hellooooooo lawsuits if you screw up!).
ellensaligo 0
You know that in bitches, the urethra opens into the ******? So to insert something into the pee hole you have to go through the vag. You're thinking of humans, where the ****** and urethra are completely separate. Dogs are different.
jarhead321 0
that poor basterd, that sounds painful
myfriend_youfail 3
Yeah, to get to it. But it sounds like Gumblebum thinks they're the exact same thing. O_o
secretgarden101 0
DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A CATHEDER IS? I hope to God that you do not become a medical professional.
emmy627 2
lmao. just what i was thinking
omgitsbritt 0
thank you, my thoughts exactly!
Crazybae 0
that suckss and that's gross !
fmivida1 0
agreed. that comment wasn't needed...
wa2_ev 0
ahahahahahahahahahaahaha :p
jAa94 2
Eek. Thats just groose.
mirkatsboss 0
lol sounds like a grimey job
PsychoMerk 0
excitement(plus)dog = ********** O_O
epoh_fml 0
the image from this comment made me cringe. Wrong fml, I know, but it's still funny :)
PsychoMerk 0
omg I laughed when I read that xD
purplemnm 9
ydi, it's painful when you pull out the needle too fast, control your emotions woman!
sleephunters 8
Just like me today and the lunch lady. lol. >.
SammyS2012 21
A catheter doesn't have a needle
MissRachieee 3
ew!
angrynegro7 16
F yours and the dog's lives!
glasgowsmile 0
lmao ! i totally agree xD
The_Toxic_Mite 0
This bitch blatantly deserves it.
Official_Person 0
That is the truest thing I have heard all day.
guillette123 0
What a ******* idiot. They should fire you already.