Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I could actually feel my toe hairs flapping in the breeze. I'm a girl. FML
Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a foot massage. I learned that his feet are ticklish when he kicked me in the face. FML
Today, I was walking in my apartment when I felt something stab my foot. Thinking it was a piece of glass, I looked down. It was one of my roommate's toenail clippings. FML
Today, I couldn't find my reading glasses, thinking perhaps i'd dropped them outside, I stepped off my deck bare foot, straight into a steaming dog turd. Only to see my glasses chewed up a few feet away. It went between my toes. FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend is incredibly ticklish on the bottom of his feet. Trying to be a bit flirty, I slowly slid two fingers down his calf and mockingly tickled his feet. He reacted by inadvertently elbowing me in the nose, nearly breaking it. FML
Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML
Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML
Today, I accidentally cut myself with a razor blade on my toe. Not only does it sting really badly, but it reinforces the fact that I have abnormally hairy toes that need to be shaved. FML
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Top comments
sum1savemeh 0
I think you might need to shave
TehFuzzyOne 0
Is that the FIRST time?
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Comments (100)
Skull_300 0
What the ****!?! If your toe hairs are that damn long, I hate to see your snatch hairs!!!
Jaded4good 0
Another reason to never date a hobbit: this entry.
awesomelylame 0
You WERE standing in the grass...are you sure it wasn't that?
brandibombastic 0
shave them!
containsnosoy 0
Heads up, screaming is never attractive. It makes people want to punch you for being an idiot.
bfffness 0
Shut the **** up... don't post stupid shit like this.
kristina2987 0
Hahaha ew!
fylseriously 0
lmfao!!!!!
blitzen123 0
Eww! You need to take care of that.
ellness 0
hahahahaha