Today, I was chaperoning at my local high school's Homecoming dance. Outside the gym, I saw some kids drinking, so I walked over to stop them. One of them promptly spun around and punched me in the mouth. I had my ass handed to by a drunk 9th grader. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my Homecoming dance. I had a great time until some fat girl kept trying to dance with my date, even though he politely asked her to stop. I decided to intervene. I found myself pinned to the floor by a fat girl crushing on my date, who was cheering her on as she tackled me. FML
Today, while on a haunted trail, I accidentally punched a high-schooler in the throat. FML
Today, at my high school reunion, my old bully tried to apologize but I told her to fuck off. She wouldn't leave me alone, so I purposely spilled my drink on her. I got kicked out. FML
Today, I chaperoned a school dance. A song I knew came on, and, wanting to be the fun teacher, I danced around a little. The students then pointed and laughed. I graduated in '87 and high school still hurts. FML
Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML
Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML
Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML
Today, I went to a party where I met some nice girls. One of them was really sweet and we were having a great time in my friend's backyard. As I was on the swing, I was gonna give her my number, but instead, I gave her a harsh kick to the face. FML
Today, my friend was picking on me at school by constantly tapping on my shoulder. At recess I had enough. I felt the familiar tap on my shoulder, and I drove my elbow into what I thought was my friend's stomach. It was my Principal. FML
Today, I finally confronted my bully. Too bad it was at my high school reunion and he beat the shit out of me. FML
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Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
His future doesn't seem very bright anyway.
ollie179 21
Now look here you young wippersnaps. Alcohol is bad ok? So let me take these and... SMACK!
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Comments (116)
YOUareALLretards 1
#57 are you completely retarded? No matter what "agreement" the parents and kids may have; in public no teenager is allowed, by law, to drink in the states. And I am willing to bet that anyone of us would be knocked on their ass by a sucker punch
numbersomething 6
well, im from holland, here one can drink with 16, so i probably have different standards.. i kinda forgot that in the USA rules are way stricter concerning alcohol... so i do get your point :D
numbersomething 6
and in case you were wondering, no i am not retarded...
eftup 9
Did you **** him up after??
choloman 0
glass chin
corrinaswan 0
Hahahah sad!
hipsterteen 7
OP If it wasn't your kid you shouldn't have done anything. Yeah, there being dumb asses for drinking but you are not there parents. If they were disrupting someone else I get it. But they weren't.
PokeSmot 10
They were at a homecoming dance that OP was chaperoning. Which means, NO PARENTS. Why would they have adult chaperones if they were not supposed to make sure that nothing ILLEGAL was going on at a school?
leadman1989 16
Oh crap I wad under the impression that YOH were a tiny woman. Are you a... a man? If so I have to ask for you man card back. It's been rejected!
ambamm135 7
You are an idiot... Sorry you fail
djhall97 0
EDont **** with 9th graders that r drunk
starwarsguy330 0
Hah, badass freshie
swampbilly 5
God I love my bud light
tsent8 15
yo man this is the first time ive evr been proud of a freshman