Today, I paid $70 to learn from the vet that my cat doesn't have a UTI, he's just developed a fetish for peeing on plastic bags. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after seeing my cat struggle to use the litterbox and produce nothing for two days, I caved and took him to the emergency vet, fearing a UTI. It wasn't. $200 and 2 Lyft rides later, he's stoned out of his mind and peeing just fine. FML
Today, I was nervous about taking my cat to the vet for a UTI, because money’s a little tight. Turns out the antibiotics weren’t that expensive, but he wants at least $1,000 for dental surgery she apparently “needs.” FML
Today, I learned why my bathroom has a horrible, seemingly irremovable stench. My cat doesn't squat to pee like a normal cat. She stands up, peeing over the side of the litter tray all over the wall and floor, which are now a permanent yellow tinge. FML
Today, I dropped $1600 at the emergency vet because I thought my 14 year-old cat was constipated or obstructed. He was neither. He just had lots of gas in his intestines. I paid $1600 to find out my cat needed to fart. FML
Today, I took my cat to the vet for an x-ray. They found three dollar coins in his stomach. The surgery to remove them is $600. FML
Today, I'm sitting at the vet's office while they run expensive tests on my cat. This is to make sure he doesn't have a bowel obstruction from eating the condom that my partner and I used last night. FML
Today, I found out after $200 worth of checks and tests, three rugs being ruined from her peeing and pooping on them, that my cat isn't sick. She just has really bad separation anxiety. FML
Today, during my shift as a vet nurse, I picked up a gorgeous cat for cuddles, only to discover it was covered with pee. And now I am too. I still have 4 hours of my shift. FML
Today, I paid $325 to have the vet tell me that my 19-year-old cat ISN'T dying, she just had anxiety shits because we were gone on vacation for so long. FML
Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
Urinary tract infection. Or in your case, unable to investigate.
fenceme235 0
ohhhh. well guess u can go green and stop buying plastic bags
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (83)
fenceme235 0
ohhhh. well guess u can go green and stop buying plastic bags
alpaquette91 9
My cat used to do that, we used to put a plastic bag lining in her litter box for easy clean up but then she started to pee on anything plastic feeling. Maybe you have the same problem
chickenwalrus 14
Cat pees on plastic bags... put plastic bags outside... cat pees outside, no extra cleanup. *trollface*
angrymexican 8
I have that same fetish
lalatookasheema 8
What the .. is a UTI?
Freeze_fml 17
Urinary tract infection. Or in your case, unable to investigate.
ollie179 21
Urinary Tract Infection
OgreBS 0
Urinary tract infection.... And I thought I was blonde!
Riya2595 15
But you have cats. I don't even own a pet. So I didn't know. But thanks to Freeze I know now! :)
StoryOfTheYear 15
Someone who thumbs down Freeze's comment either is jealous or missed the thumbs up button. Nicely done.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
18, Do you also not own a body?
ShyAnn29 15
Humans can also get a UTI, which is not very pleasant!
DreBeezy 9
Humans get urinary tract infections too, even more than animals......
BloodofaSavior 0
Urinary tract infection
StoryOfTheYear 15
Way to be 10 hours late.
curlyfry33 8
You probly shoulent be a slob and leave plastic bags randomly laying around
ollie179 21
So don't let him near plastic bags
eminarnar 0
Don't keep plastic bags by that kinky cat of yours.
sparklybetty 0
Just get him his own plastic bag and let him have his way ;)
s0m3guy2010 21
At least it didnt develop a fetish for pissing on the carpet, couch, or anything else that's expensive.
VeganVampyre 27
Exactly! It could be much worse. When my cat gets a UTI she pees AND poops in my clothes. Yey.
jellitonoctopus 19
Place a plastic bag in his litter box.
Mercedes16 7
You should have got him a 'cat' scan. I know . I'm not funny.
StoryOfTheYear 15
*gives courtesy thumbs up*
Livencountry 5
That made me chuckle tbh.
amberskyz 4
Thats so gross. Cat piss is so rank. Either break Mr.Frisky of his new kink by squirting him in the face everytime he shows interest in a plastic bag or send him on his way. Or just let your house reek of cat piss and it will be just u and kitty for a long long time.
MagicallyFat 12
**** you lady. You don't just throw a cat out for doing that. Just like how your mom didn't throw you out for being a bitch.
nikkibee50 10
Wow u really feel some type of way about that? Lol calm down, to let a pet go is a very hard decision to make, but at the same time, if my cat can't stop pissing on things in my home, it has to go... Period. And if u don't like it, bite me.
Ricky23J 0
reading this FML made my brain explode.
ydi_4_suking 20
Dumbass
Ricky23J 0
**** you! Internet gangster