Today, I was at a party at my boyfriend's house. As I was walking past him, he pulled me onto his lap and started introducing me to a childhood friend. I sneezed and accidently peed on him. I'm 6 months pregnant and can't control my bladder. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and badly needed to pee. Just as I was about to say I had to go to the bathroom, my boyfriend suddenly put his hands around my stomach and picked me up. He hit just the right spot, causing me to empty my bladder then and there. FML
Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML
Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML
Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, I'm 8 months pregnant and I went to pee at 2 a.m., with the light off to avoid waking my husband. The wanker had left the seat up, so I fell right into the bowl and got stuck with my cheeks in the water because my belly wouldn’t let me get up. My useless sleeping husband couldn’t hear me yell for help. FML
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Top comments
FalloutScrolls 25
1) Congratulations on your baby. 2) Good for you, marking your territory like that.
happypenguins 24
That really sucks op but congratulations on the baby!
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Comments (65)
lulinator 40
I feel ya! I sneeze and pee all the time these days. One more month, and I'll hopefully have control over that again. Never peed on anyone but myself though, that's a good story for you later on.
domolovesyoshi 33
My sister is almost 38weeks and she's never even pees herself, she's so lucky in that section but unlucky is other sections so I think that makes up for it, bless her
MallowMistress 13
Unfortunately, many women struggle with that post birth. Worsening after each pregnancy. Most women around me have to cross their legs if they have to sneeze, to control it.
anyagrande 31
Agreeing with #18 many women usually have absolutely no bladder control after labour and need to constantly wear those panty liners for incontinence
ABlindMan 17
My mother has had 5 children and occasionally will pee herself when she sneezes. It's actually quite hilarious.
sailorarctic 22
Nope. my baby girl is 5 months old today and though I'm a lot better now than I was immediately after her birth I still struggle to not wet myself a little when I sneeze/cough. Kegals do help, but they are hard to do if you've never consciously used those muscles before.
tomvertigo 17
That sucks but it comes with the territory! Congrats on the baby!
sweetbliss3 37
am I the only one wondering why they don't live together?
MallowMistress 13
I'm pregnant with my boyfriends child, if we moved in together, it'd be when I was around 7-8 months at earliest. Not all couples live together, even those expecting.
catsy101 6
nope, not the only one. And pregnant with your boyfriend, not even fiancé? Congrats on the baby though?
corky1992 33
I was 6 months pregnant when I moved in with my boyfriend. Maybe they're planning on it and it just hasn't happened yet. They could be looking for a new place to move into together.
DoomedGemini 38
No, it's really none of your business. It has nothing to do with the FML, why the hell should you care?
Kaitlynandzach 6
Don't feel too bad, Leah from Teen Mom peed all over herself when going to buy a car with her now ex-husband. And that part was aired on TV.
Rodville 28
That one happened to my wife. We were in a dealership and when she stood up there was a puddle in the chair. We all though her water broke. The nurse in the ER said "sorry love, you just peed yourself."
Krankerev 10
Teen. Teen. That's pathetic.
PMprotege 9
If that happened to me I'd be pissed off
jacqui_matznick 17
Actually, you'd be pissed ON?
awesumous 16
Congrats on the baby, but if you can't control your bladder aren't there special diapers for that and even some pads I'm sure would work if you didn't want to wear an adult diaper.
SpyroMello 29
She can't control her bladder because the baby squishes are her organs and when they do something as simple as a sneeze, the baby can hit the bladder and cause the mother to urinate. While a diaper would catch the urine, I wouldn't want to wear one for the next 3 months until birth because I pee when my unborn child unexpectedly hits my bladder.
nyagemini23 22
congrats on the little one! I know how that goes. everytime i threw up i peed
lynnlady 6
Me too!
manuwish 9
I'm with
Sora_McKain 36
...Who? What? I'm curious as to who or what you're with.
renrioku 15
I think he is with or is stupid.
McFishFilet 9
Honestly YDI if you're going to get pregnant before marriage. Not that it has anything to do with it, just stupid as ****.
mezochan 29
I feel you, OP. Hang in there!