Today, I was at a party at my boyfriend's house. As I was walking past him, he pulled me onto his lap and started introducing me to a childhood friend. I sneezed and accidently peed on him. I'm 6 months pregnant and can't control my bladder. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and badly needed to pee. Just as I was about to say I had to go to the bathroom, my boyfriend suddenly put his hands around my stomach and picked me up. He hit just the right spot, causing me to empty my bladder then and there. FML
Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML
Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML
Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, I'm 8 months pregnant and I went to pee at 2 a.m., with the light off to avoid waking my husband. The wanker had left the seat up, so I fell right into the bowl and got stuck with my cheeks in the water because my belly wouldn’t let me get up. My useless sleeping husband couldn’t hear me yell for help. FML
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Top comments
FalloutScrolls 25
1) Congratulations on your baby. 2) Good for you, marking your territory like that.
happypenguins 24
That really sucks op but congratulations on the baby!
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Comments (65)
Inkoseh 33
Start Kegals now! I am pregnant and had your problem at 4 months, started kegals and haven't had the problem since! (now 6.5m!)
corky1992 33
As embarrassing as that is its actually pretty common. I hope your boyfriend and his friend handled it well.
heyLaddieHey 18
That sucks! I hope he was chill about it (no screaming "Eww you peed on me!")
PhantomKitty 26
Yes.
lauren01216 2
Awe, should have gotten married first (****)
VanillaButterfly 14
How would her being married change anything about this FML? A ring on her finger wouldn't stop her from peeing herself.
queen_lol 24
Hi everyone OP here. i am actually engaged i just dont use the word fiance because im not used to using that word even though ive been engaged for a while now. I got engaged before i even got pregnant, not that i owe anyone an explanation. As for calling me a ****? Ive been with this one man for 3 and a half years and ONLY him. Becoming pregnant before marriage does not make me a **** , just like waiting to have kids until your married doesnt make you a saint. But have fun trying to down talk people but your opinion is really unwanted.
VanillaButterfly 14
Good on you for standing up for yourself, OP! I don't know why he felt the need to be so judgemental. As for everything else, congrats on your relationship and the baby. I wish you luck on both. :)
blueyekai 17
Just because your religion or culture says so, that doesn't mean everyone else has to follow it. Asshole
blueyekai 17
Did he at least burp you?
CarleeLynneXO 5
congrats! don't worry lol it happens
completenonsense 16
I peed in the middle of the classroom in 4th grade and some guy touched it and smelled it to check if it was just apple juice. hope that made u feel better
Shalnar 6
Motherhood is beautiful in any form.
Geckosrock99 33
Better to be pissed off than pissed on. Wait...