Today, I told my 13 year-old daughter that she was grounded from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd picked up the phone, my daughter starts screaming, "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I bought my daughter a rape alarm after she had a near-miss with a creep following her to her part-time job. As soon as I handed it to her in the car park, she accidentally set it off and one of her coworkers put me in a rather painful headlock and threw me to the ground, breaking my arm. FML
Today, I found my daughter playing on my phone. When I got it back, I saw multiple texts to my boss saying that I quit. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school. They found her on the roof, threatening to kill herself. I had to pretend to sound scared and sad over the phone, but in reality, the only emotion I could feel was extreme joy. FML
Today, I had to end a phone conversation with, "I gotta go, my daughter's eating toilet paper." FML
Today, I checked my inbox and realized I got an email from a potential employer, saying they were having trouble getting a hold of me by phone. They called while my mom was using my phone to look up directions to a place, and she answered, kindly hanging up when they asked for me. FML
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
Today, at work I got told off by my manager for texting while working. Enraged by this, I trash talked her to the new girl at work. The new girl, a.k.a. my manager's daughter. FML
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Top comments
noshitsherlock 0
WOW. Since it was so ******* important (HELLO, JOB), you should punish her by making her live off of the bare minimum for at least a month - NO CELL PHONE AT ALL, basic shitty food, no new clothes, etc.
Simbo_fml 0
wow. you have a really messed up daughter.
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Comments (246)
Logan1524 0
when did parents lose their backbone??? Omg if I woulda done that inevitable add whipping and no its not child abuse its simply called discipline
haylieakers13 0
You have one spoiled brat. When im grounded, i fix my problem & dont beg to be ungrounded. Doing that makes my mom feel i respect her, so she ungrounds me(:
shannonfeliz 0
Rape is not something you cry wolf over. Seriously, look at Jaycee Dugard. I hope you give her a good beating, and take away everything. Her phone, laptop, Facebook, etc. I also hope you ground her till she moves out, because thats ridiculous and rude. You have a messed up daughter, man. Have you considered bordering school?
megarawrrxd 0
Am I the only one whose noticed. The main ones getting mad over this are the kiddies? I remember using pay phones, gas stations, and stores (for all the ones nagging about the city). Society now days disappoint me. -.-
newlove_fml 0
Wow guys. The sheer logic your trying to use here. Just wow. The world is incredibly dangerous, yes. Some kids live in dangerous neighborhoods, yes. Does that mean having a cell phone makes you safer? Oh, sure, next time someones holding you at gun point, just whip out your trusty cell phone and call up a few friends, maybe even the police. It's not like someones threatening to shoot you in the head if you get them caught. Yeah. Cell phones. So effective in protecting against criminals. You know what would be even more effective? Pepper spray, maybe? Oh jee, I don't know. That sounds incredibly ridiculous. Come on, aim and shoot vs dial and wait? Yeah right. (for those of you who may not have caught it, that was entirely sarcasm. Using "the world is dangerous" as a reason for children to have cell phones is pretentious bull crap. You all know it. Your using a serious situation as an excuse for a useless privilege. Stop it.)
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Your daughter is a spoiled little brat and it was in very bad taste to scream something like that over the phone. Rape is not something to be taken lightly, and countless victims don't even report it for fear of no one believing them, or for fear of their own lives. Your daughter did that over a cell phone? Maybe she shouldn't have behaved in a manner that cost her the privileges of it in the first place. I hope you punish her even more.
jabs98 1
dont take away ur daughters fone, i txt in mine a lot and if my parents took it away i'd do that too.
charliewetsidege 2
and she thinks she's getting her phone back
xTheSceneQueenxx 0
What a douche bag. Extend that grounding for another month. Actually, let her meet a real rape victim. Or find a disgusting and brutal murder that included rape.
KingCeltic77 18
Take away her cell phone for good. Jokes on her, you can't pay a phone bill with no income.