Today, at work, this woman came up to my counter and handed me a gold top covered in gold sequins. I like to chat with the customers sometimes at work so I got all excited and said, "Ooh! You shopping for Halloween?" She gave me the biggest death stare. Turns out she wasn't shopping for Halloween. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hoped whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch." Okay then. FML
Never gonna let me live it down
Today, at work, I was making an appointment for an old lady who told me, "You look like a movie star!" I started to thank her when she followed up with, "Like that girl from the horror movie! Your black hair and pale skin makes you look scary! Oh, sorry…" with the coworker I hate the most sitting right next to me. FML
Today, I was working as a cashier and a woman brought up a suitcase. As I was ringing her up I checked inside like I'm supposed to and I very jokingly say, "Look at all the stuff you're stealing." She laughed nervously then hit me in the head with her heavy purse before running out of the store. FML
Who am I?
Today, I went to a grocery store after work, exhausted. I nodded politely at a woman who smiled at me repeatedly. I realized at checkout she thought I was someone she knew. I nodded through a full conversation without knowing who I was pretending to be. FML
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML
Cash
Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML
Today, at my new job, I took some food out to a customer. Walking away, I heard a lady mumble, "Oh my God, you could never pay me enough to wear that." FML
Weirdo alert
Today, a customer came into the store I work at to ask why I hadn't killed myself yet. A month prior, that same customer told me to kill myself. All I did was compliment her shirt. FML
My eyes are up here
Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML
Top comments
_Noon_ 0
Hahaha, kind of YDI, but I voted FYL because you were just trying to be nice, and lets face it, people who are buying that kind of clothes...
noshitsherlock 0
hahahahhaha. She sounds like a grumpy fabulous person
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Comments (52)
IamSpartacus 0
Haha. You failed.
Hunthas 17
the same thing happened to me, except with raccoons :(
BuddyChristSays 0
and that's why you don't talk to people who wear stuff from the Quacker Factory.
_Noon_ 0
Hahaha, kind of YDI, but I voted FYL because you were just trying to be nice, and lets face it, people who are buying that kind of clothes...
americayay 0
Yeah, but it's at the store she works at. She really shouldn't be insulting the product.
sika_fml 0
She's not really. If she's the kind of person who wants to wear a gold sequin top...then she should own it and not get offended. It's obviously a bit of an outrageous top.
noshitsherlock 0
hahahahhaha. She sounds like a grumpy fabulous person
BellaMuerte_fml 0
I'm kind of torn on this one. One hand hand, sequins? Seriously? That's really tacky... Very Halloween-ish. So it is obvious as to where the OP got that idea from. However, assuming things ALWAYS gets thrown back in your face /:
leonora_fml 0
Yeah, you really need to think long and hard about this one, because your decision whether they deserve it or whether their life really is ****** will change the world as we know if. Forever. No one cares what you vote. Stop boring us with your stupid dilemmas.
BeeSkwaird 0
Beautiful Death is probably a cashier. Even if not, don't knock a legitimate comment.
Red_Dawn 0
#10: Stop reading the ******* comments if you complain about them. You have a scrollbar to the right of your browser and a mouse and even keyboard functions to make the page move up and down to read other comments or even (GASP!) ignore them and move along. /end hypocrisy
BellaMuerte_fml 0
Woahhh theree.... haha, I got flamed for such a simple comment? Sorry for boring you with my 'dilemma'. And I just noticed I made a typo-thing. I wrote "One hand hand" and I meant "On one hand". Not sure how I did that. @BeeSkwaird - I'm not a cashier :3 Haha. Red_Dawn - haha. thanks. I think #10 is on her period.
fatraptorjesus13 9
10...you're comment is even more useless...
redbluegreen 41
Mmm. I can't wait for the idiots to come and not understand the FML.
Armin_fml 0
Well.. I guess I'm first. And that'd mainly be because English isn't my mother tongue :c Thank you for destroying my self-esteem with a simple sentence *cries in a corner*
Clitastrophe 0
Sequins are just that damn sexy ; )
POW96 0
hahaha damn right they're sexy ;)
spyderman2190 0
YDI for makin small talk...naw im kidding screw her for not pickin better clothes
giiiiinge 0
i agree with number #23 (:
diet_otaku 0
alright, whoever's #23 needs to post something like "The Holocaust isn't real."
giiiiinge 0
number 23 fails :( i thought i would get some lolz out of that but no, they had a big rant. LOLOCAUST.. no.
Peroxide 3
I hate dealing with the public. That's why when ever I see a customer coming my way looking like they want my help I run out the back of the store and hide untill they leave. I wonder why I haven't won employee of the month yet???