Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to make the switch from pads to tampons. My boyfriend ended up having to show me how to apply them. FML
Today, I was mugged while changing my tampon. The mugger took everything, including the fresh tampon. FML
Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML
Today, I used a menstrual cup for the first time. I couldn't get it out, after what seemed like ages of trying. I had to ask my boyfriend to help me. He'll never look at me the same way again. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that I'm allergic to a particular brand of tampon. FML
Today, I realized I get more pleasure from a tampon than my boyfriend I have been having sex with for the past six months. FML
Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML
Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML
Today, I woke up in a puddle of blood after 7 hours of sleep. Before going to bed, I had inserted a tampon that should've kept me dry for at least 8 hours. Apparently it doesn't work well if sleepy me forgets to take the top part of the plastic wrapping off. FML
Today, I'm sick with a fever, and on my cycle I was too tired and forgot to change my tampon, and ended up putting another one in. I woke up to go to the bathroom and ended up pulling two out. FML
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Top comments
22jrdn55 15
"**** yourself!" is only a phrase, don't take it too literally!
efemel94 7
Tell me about it, putting a tampon in my penis felt so unnatural at first :/
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Comments (363)
CamiKitti 3
I just tried my first tampon on Friday. It hurts at first, but you'll get it. It comes easy for some people. I only had to wear it because I can't wear pads with thongs... Relax, and use a hand mirror. I recommend using the Gentle Glide 360 from Playtex. Try the slender light one first. They come with a plastic applicator and it's pretty small. You may leak if you have a heavy flow. If so, buy the combo pack with slender light and regular, just to be sure. (The regulars kinda hurt more to get out though.) Good luck :)
power6053 4
Edb
perdix 31
It wasn't necessary to tell yourself, "Shut up, bitch!" That was over the top.
WtfLoser 13
36 - You put your finger in your bloody hole then put the tampon in? That's not right, s'disgusting. Oh, by the way, OP, as many up there said, use the plastic ones. And the reason why you feel so weird right now is probably because you didn't insert it until the end. You're probably too scared that it "gets lost in you" or something. So uh, push it in! :D Best of luck, chin up & don't joke around about being raped.
Katastrophe101 8
Why is it gross if someone sticks their finger up there to help them insert a tampon? If it helps, go for it. It's called washing your hands. :P
SpRiTzSpLaSh 7
My ****** is very wide so I had no probem getting that thing in there!!!!1
jsprackman 11
Good for u.
chels1994 11
Understandable...I think everyone is somewhat nervous when first using them.. just relax, read the directions, and if it doesn't work at first, simply try again
sceptic 1
Shut the **** up
EpicSquishii 21
I didn't have much trouble putting mine IN for the first time. It was taking it out that hurt me. I was impatient and tried to soon after putting it in and when I tried removing the thing I whimpered and squealed through it for like six tries before I ran a bathtub full of hot water and took it out in there. But this one creepy girl in highschool ran out of pads and I handed her a tampon and waited outside her stall for an hour and a half trying to talk her through it and she kept saying "I can't find the HOLE!!!!!!" The nasty bitch finally came out but showed me her hands, saying "Hehee! Bloody fingers!" I wanted to kick her in the twat. And before you ask. Yes. She was a ginger.
BostonBruinsFan 8
I was gonna ask if she was a blonde....they are dumber:(
4rmMiami 4
It's okay girls gotta do what a girls got to do!!!
babygirl225665 0
Lol it's difficult the first time