Today, I signed up to a Christian website in order to try and 'find God again'. I got banned. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a moderator. Instead, I got banned. FML
Today, I was on my favourite forum when I saw a guy ranting at some pro-lifer fanatic. For fun, I replied "umad bro?" apparently moments after the forum founder also left an angry reply. I'm now banned for a month for "trolling the founder" and all my posts have vanished without a trace. FML
Today, I confessed my love for the girl I like, on the forum she moderates. She responded by banning me. FML
Discord mods
Today, I made a Discord account for the first time and got banned, even though I hadn't even logged in. Like, how is that possible? FML
Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML
Today, I arrived at work to find out someone had signed me up to a dating site. Apparently, my inability to speak to women has reached "boss level". Quite literally, as my boss was the one who signed me up. FML
Some angel
Today, I clicked on an “Angel Message” website link from a website I use to research Wicca. As I am a witch with 7 years experience, I knew this was too good to be true, but thought it would just be good for a laugh. Turns out it was a scam website. FML
Today, I signed up for an online dating site. In order to prove I was human and complete my registration, I had to pass a CAPTCHA. Coincidentally enough, the words in it were "depressed" and "loser". FML
Today, I went to a camp my friend invited me to, thinking we'd just be roasting marshmallows all day and hanging out outside. Nope. It was a soul searching, "get closer to Jesus" camp. The first five hours were spent repeatedly praying and singing. I'm not a Christian. FML
Framed
Today, I tried joining a Roblox game, only to discover I was banned. According to the game's creator, it was because I'd exploited on an alt. The alt was an account intentionally impersonating me in order to frame me. FML
Top comments
FYLDeep 26
Well you shouldn't have come here looking for God. There's no shortage of assholes here.
Quyzl 0
Then you went to the wrong Christians; there are still some good ones. FYL.
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Comments (103)
yeahthatsrite 0
lol have fun with that
shmeggles 3
hahaha
TransitionCovert 6
Were you trolling?
Selena_is_back 7
You should run away from your house and change your name! "Run Jessevi, RUN!!!".
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I know the feeling I joined green peace and they kicked me out for ordering a veal steak
0opsie 6
Cue the religious/anti-religious rants!
Themistocles_fml 0
The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the true god.
Themistocles_fml 0
Accept The Flying Spaghetti Monster as your savior and be a Pastafarian.
EffinAhole 0
You shouldn't have posted those naked pictures of yourself posing with buddy Jesus.
jewban 3
ydi lol
breelovesu1 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
aw that sucks but you deserve it
jpest17 5
how???
jewban 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
cause god doesn't exist trolololol
Quyzl 0
Then you went to the wrong Christians; there are still some good ones. FYL.
tamiami247 0
Amen!! We're not all crazy...much. :) ♥
Quyzl 0
Lots of you are, but not all.
Brandi_Faith 34
True! And alot of "Christian"chat sites have people just going nuts with horrible comments and they're really there just to troll. But if you are looking to find God again go to the nearest Christian church, something like Pentecostal would probably be good, make sure you talk to a pastor! Maybe not a catholic church, not that there's anything wrong with Catholics or their churches! But alot of people find it really difficult to listen if the service is really boring or the music is bad ect. Another peice of advice, there's an app called "Got Questions" that's really great, they may even have a website. And get a bible and start reading Matthew, and just go from there! PM me if you have any other questions! Hope that helps!!
FYLDeep 26
Well you shouldn't have come here looking for God. There's no shortage of assholes here.
Bullet4MyChemaMo 12
Why, what did you do?
Skyke 0
um lol or you know, you could try actually going to church instead of "finding god" on the INTERNET.... YDI.
Draminicaus 0
I had always wondered when they would start preaching over webcam.
onikage_666 0
but you can find everything on the interweb
BloodyHeel 8
The Internet is a more sustainable source.
YourWetDream 0
Wow that kind of sucks, but what did you do to deserve that? You couldn't of been banned for no reason. Next time I guess you can go to church...
FYLDeep 26
You was probably trolling.
detolicious 2
Can't find god, cuz he aint there.
Skyke 0
douche
detolicious 2
yep, faith and tolerance - the more you have of one, the less you have of the other.
anonymousfmlr 0
Now that's a generalization if there ever was one.
carcinogan 0
thank you. how the **** can you believe in something you can't see? contradiction to that? air. sure we can't see it but we can physically feel it so uhh we are 100% sure air is there :) no proof of god. nothing.
TheDrifter 24
So that case of HIV you caught is imaginary 51? After all if you can't see it it's not real right?
lovelove24 1
umm i can feel god. i feel him in my heart.
Selena_is_back 7
51, so you're telling me God isn't real just because you don't see him? Bullshit. Let's take an example of your case; Your brain, do you see it? NO.
poplmon 0
No proof of God except for everything around us. Where's all the proof existence owes us?!
CheshireKattt 0
have you ever seen china or what about touched the moon btw I completely agree with you but you have to admit there is no legitimate evidence for it OR against it
rein 8
you believe you have a brain and a heart even though you can't see it right you douche
Geoffrx7 0
yay!! it's the best. I love God
detolicious 2
oh look what i've done. btw, some of you may want to read a science book - I'd actually encourage you to read as many as you can
boopityboppity 11
Everyone, stop the petty insults. The mods are watching. If you can't civilly discuss things, we soon won't be able to discuss at all. Oh, and you don't help your case — for whichever side you're arguing — if you're downright rude.
0opsie 6
You didn't figure out all that stuff in your science books. You've never seen the inside of a cell with your own eyes or spend years researching the accuracy of carbon dating. You've never measured the distance form the Earth to the moon. You accept it by faith because 'people who know what they're talking about' say it's true. Just like the religious teachings. So how are you any smarter than people who believe in God?
medfly 2
I beg to differ I have seen a cell in a microscope with my own eyes in middle school, I can measure the distance between the earth and the moon using my middle school geometry (and some tools to measure angles which I lack) to a reasonable accuracy. the reason I believe those people is that they don't sound like idiots and I can't pick out things that are obviously wrong in what they say nearly as quickly. you obviously can't specialize in everything. for example, a lot of religious people believe that the bible is 100% true - but it even contradicts itself (examples are plenty, there are stories told twice with small variation to fit another world view. in fact, just open the first few pages. the story of creation is the first example.) then, there's the ridiculous story of things like bible code - people believing that the bible can tell you the future. except that if you try to actually predict anything with it, say "will x be president or y", you will be able to tell both.
PinkityPink 0
You might not see your brain, but if you were to crack your skull open, then you could see it there. There is evidence that you do actually have a brain and a heart. But where is the real evidence of god? People may claim they feel him or see him but there's no evidence. There are no photographs and no way to truly prove that there is a god.
boopityboppity 11
If you were to crack your skull open enough to see your brain, you'd also probably see God fairly soon. Ba-dum chshhhh.
mickeyymouse 0
^^^ I also beg to differ,, except against you. no immediate faults?? absolute poppycock. if matter can neither be created nor destroyed, how do you expect a big bang (which has no way of occurring without SOMETHING setting it off, and your theory says there was nothing) to create all this matter? of course there'll be faults on the bible, a couple of hundred years ago people went through and edited it, picking books that would either be excluded (and as a result, lost) or included, which obviously made it inaccurate in some ways. but how often are your science books contradicting themselves? look back 20 years and you will see different information and and theories that exist today, and moving forward your theories now will change as well. pot, kettle. don't bring up 'faults' with our beliefs if yours has the same faults. and frankly I'd rather be christian and be wring about god (we just.. die) than be atheist and be wrong. one way your wrong an you'll never know it and it won't affect you, the other way you'll be in hell forever. think about that.
boopityboppity 11
Thanks for that last bit, Blaise Pascal— erm, 94.
0opsie 6
#89 That was vague wording on my part. What I meant was "Have you seen the inside of a cell and you, personally studied the different organelles and their functions? Not by reading what's printed in a science book, but recreating the decades of research and experiments done by scientists." There are a lot of things you see with your own eyes. But you can't ignore that there are a lot of things you accept as fact because the people saying it "don't sound like idiots". Until you prove it to yourself, you are only just believing in it. You said it yourself, you can't specialize in everything. Which is exactly my point. Science is about facts, proof, and research. I'm just saying that believing whatever it teaches is no different than faith in religion.
Selena_is_back 7
When I was in 8th grade I read about this "Is science and religion different?"... (Just saying)
bigphill1333 0
Why couldn't god have made the big bang and evolution happen? Couldn't that be a possibility??
maphineRAWRS 10
why sign up to a website to find god again? do it by other means?
Themistocles_fml 0
Did OP lose god the first time so he felt the need to find god again?