Today, I saw that my ex-boyfriend was online and had no plans. I felt extreme happiness knowing he had no life. Then I realized that I was online and had no plans. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my long-distance boyfriend wanted to spend time online with me. He kept quiet on Skype and went on a hundred different stupid websites, laughing by himself. Afterwards, he told me he really enjoyed our time together. FML
Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML
Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her Facebook status said, "Pointless day, gone to bed." FML
Today, my boyfriend took a day off from work because he felt "sick". I thought he might come see me since he hadn't come over in a while. Nope, he went to hang out with his ex instead. FML
Today, looking on the internet, I came across my ex's Facebook page. Most of the posts were about me, and his profile picture was still of me and him. We broke up over a year ago. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend added his ex on Facebook and Instagram, all within a few days. Lucky me. FML
Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to being in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML
Today, despite a car accident, lockdowns, and the stress of dealing with an elderly parent, I have been so happy planning a vacay with my amazing boyfriend. I woke up to being dumped because he feels he needs to prioritize his time between his kid and work. Immediately after, he popped up as active online in a game. FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend after two days of purposely not seeing him, just so he could have the chance to "miss me." When I asked him if he'd missed me, he said no. FML
Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
r0ck5t4r 3
Just because someone doesn't have plans on one particular night doesn't mean they don't have a life...
lammylamb17 0
ahhh classic tale of the Facebook stalker....
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Comments (144)
yumsugarr 8
Er. okay. kindaaa pathetic?
EddieGrimaldo 0
I hate immature people like that, doesn't it just annoy you?
skyttlz 32
who voted FYL?
FFML_314 12
What part of "ex" don't you understand. Stop being a creeper and get over it. Even if he didn't have a life, it wouldn't make yours anymore valuable. You creepy, creepy lady!
sourgirl101 29
Could I stalk you?jk (: Missed you bunny! I did notice you were gone awhile. Is that consided stalking?
ohthebloodygore 16
SG, stalker! :P Ah, hell. I guess this makes me a stalker too. Aria, I don't understand the 'x' part. The 'e' I do understand.
FFML_314 12
I took a much needed leave of absence! I'm back and ready to swing the hatchet on the poor helpless kiddos! You guys can stalk me. ;D I've missed you all!
nerdsgetmehot 23
Nice and quiet = boring. You know you missed her, Doc. Admit it...
ohthebloodygore 16
Doc, stop trollin'. You know you missed her. I know I did. I nagged and begged asking her to comment again.
FFML_314 12
Of course he missed me! Doc is my male clone. Seems like he did a good job of keeping things under control while I was out. Of course it's nice and quiet when I'm not around, I'm a bitch and certainly not quiet! :D
ohthebloodygore 16
I'm the sweet quiet one.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Why did my comment get marked down? *Disgruntled* And by the way, FFML_314, I must admit that I missed your presence quite a bit!
FFML_314 12
I'm glad to have such a wide welcome back! Precious, I don't think so. :P
ohthebloodygore 16
Marked down? Why wasn't I aware? Stupid app. Aria, what are you trying to say? I am sweet and quiet. Idiots.
tacobird123 7
Yay :D. Why am I happy she's back? Hmm I guess it makes this website fun ;p.
DocBastard 40
Trollin', eh? I think may try it. It looks like such fun! Nerds, you're back at even. No worries. I'm sure all the trolls are looking at this thread and seeing that the collective IQ on this comment is over 1000, and they're getting worried. That's right, little trolls, we're all coming for you! Boo!
boopityboppity 11
*Joins the fray* Teh internetz has missed you, FFML. Welcome back.
zp5 4
me? stalk you? nahhh. O.o
tacobird123 7
Now that I think of it where are the trolls?!? Have they crawled back into there little troll cave?
nocanhaz 4
FFML left? nobody tells me anything
nerdsgetmehot 23
Haha. You're probably correct on that one, Doc! :P
FFML_314 12
Thank you, Boopityboppity! PM coming your way!
docscientist 10
IQ sums do not create additive efficiency. Just trollin' err sayin'.
FFML_314 12
I wonder how many of you still comment on this site regularly?
stayc0103 0
Stalker
IcyJack 7
and "Forever Alone"
PointAndLaugh 0
Leave the memes in 4chan.
crksNcstls503 0
a pair of no lifes haha
TerrorDollie 0
You shouldn't care. YDI.
smallsmerry 0
MAKE PLANS, CRY ME A RIVER, BUILD A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT ************ IT'S NOT THAT DAMN HARD!!!! IF YOU ARE THAT BORING THEN GO TO THE ******* WALMART, BUY SOME LIFE CEREAL, SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS AND THEN GET A LIFE!!!!
DocBastard 40
Decaf. Try it.
DocBastard 40
Aaaaaaand there go the mods making me look silly again. *sigh* Seriously, I don't need your help with that. My own inadequacies are more than enough, thanks.
BWill9014 4
why is this even a fml... like seriously lol
AlexBuda 0
Theres no problem with free time, but there is a problem with being a petty stalker YDI!
scotty2hottie48 0
loser