Today, while trying to pull a nail out of some wood with a crowbar in my theatre class, my girlfriend, who was holding down the wood with her foot, thought it would be funny to move her foot and make me lose my balance. Instead, the crowbar flew up and struck me in the nuts. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was making my bed, which would normally be a simple task, until I leaned into the wooden foot of my bed, and put my entire body weight on my left nut. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today I had a narrow escape with a nailgun that nailed my workboot to the floor but luckily missed my foot. After I calmed down and changed boots I returned to the nailgun, started working again and barely 30 seconds later I managed to nail my thumb to a piece of wood. Man, I'm bad at my job. FML
Today, I was making my bed and had an armload of pillows. One slipped and I tried to catch it between my arm and leg. I missed, sending my fist into my nuts. FML
Today, we were playing a game at work where whenever someone is in the washroom, we throw a 2 inch lug nut at the door because it makes a huge bang and scares whoever is in there. I was just opening the door to exit when someone threw the nut. It hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML
Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML
Today, I was leaning under a counter to get my girlfriend her favorite snack food out of a low cabinet when she decided it would be funny to poke me while I was in an awkward position. I jerked up, rammed my head on the bottom of the counter, and ended up at the ER with staples in my head. FML
Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
Today, the lights went out at the gym while I was holding a heavy bar. I tried to put it back on the rack, missed, and dropped it on my toe. Then, as I was limping around in pain, I hit my head on one of the other bars on a rack at head height. FML
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Top comments
kerrygirl 13
on the bright side she'l do everything you ask her to do for the next few days......
_Dusty_ 0
Yes, but not in that order.
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Comments (107)
kerrygirl 13
on the bright side she'l do everything you ask her to do for the next few days......
theQunit 0
and it was still funny probably
erikahhh 0
Aww I'm sorry. You should dump her.
Averizzle 0
Test if you can still have babies on her face!
DGross 8
Sounds like you are in an abusive relationship with that crowbar... I would advise you try to go back to your GF and see if she accepts you. Then again, if the crowbar also has an FML account, it may already be too late... So sorry to hear about your loss OP...
pipsqueak2099 0
YDI. 1) You use the back of the hammer not a crowbar. 2) You should know to screw it down to something rather than having someone stand on it. 3) If you fail at that, stand on it with your own foot. It isn't that hard.
loludeserveit 0
if he used the back of the hammer, his fml would be about him stabbing his nuts with the hammer head.
taintpainter 0
ydi for being in theater class.
GeoThermalSleuth 0
I will never look at a Crowbar the same. That just gives me the Chills thinking about it. I'm so sorry OP
ZleveL 0
I feel you, #22
jf7609 0
FYL for being in theater class. LOL
xoconnie 8
why were yoy trying to pull a nail ot of wood in theater class....... Whaaaat thheee hellll. sounds like woodshop. whatev, anyway. fyl for having a RETARDED gf.(:
rawr_iliketacos 0
how do you stab yourself with a hammer?
LMA0 5
She's gonna be sucking the metal out of your wood tonight! ;)
Philosophic 0
@ 15 - You sir, are an idiot. The "back" of a hammer, is the 'head', while the "front" is the 'teeth'.
hotscar 3
wow, great angle. say, what's your number?
underfailer 0
who is she? #1 as we can all tell she does not exist. I call fake he said theater and girlfriend in the same sentence
kmdfirefox 0
adding to first comment, you could make her do a lot of things /elbow
fmlsoobad 0
i feel bad for the crowbar having to (feel) yur nuts
Immature_fml 0
#62, that makes no sense whatsoever. OP, I'm sorry to say this, but you've got to stop bitching and let it heal without putting it online. I've been hit in the nads quite a bit today and somehow, despite not being hit by a crowbar, I feel fine.
M4V3R1CKR13 0
shes a keeper
bluesclues72 0
@58: So you're saying to part of the hammer that looks like claws is the, "head" and the part that is round and flat is/are the teeth?
Betz 10
better the crowbar than the nail perhaps?
icall_BS 0
Don't blame the crowbar. He just wanted to blow him.
Loony_fml 4
WIN! It's her loss really, because now she can't have your babies.
hellzrydaz 0
1800-LICKMYBALLS
MasqueradePrince 25
Lots of chicks are in theater class. There's a technical theatre class and a theatre arts class. In both you do a little work with building sets. Besides theatre ******* rocks.
Mehness 0
I call some random number! That's right, delete me fools!
bugmenot1 1
A) Dump her B) Have her make up for it
_Dusty_ 0
Yes, but not in that order.
VoucheNogJZ14 0
pity sex
cambition_fml 0
another one bites the dust....
cookiemonster17 0
haha
amymarie13 0
Ap.
Diannaa 0
So many painful FML's o.o
fball913 0
hahahah in the dinkle berries
FYLvsYDI 0
damn!!! FYL sorry OP
youthink_fml 0
Your girlfriend's hilarious. Dump the idiot.
Fedor_is_KING 0
No awesome analogies like the eggplant guy, but your crowbar beats his turkey. FYL
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Well, YDI for having headcrabs in your crotch area.