Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML
Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML
Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML
Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML
Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML
Today. I used the restroom at the mall. After I wiped, I went to toss the paper into the toilet. I missed horribly. The wad of TP with poop on it landed on the floor of the next stall. It was occupied. FML
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Top comments
lambda_fml 40
Holy shit!
cakefete2 31
That's extra funny given your profile pic. Btw, do you Noah guy who can fix OP's toilet seat?
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Comments (78)
ZoroMiHawk 25
If you sat down and the seat slid immediately, how is it possible that you were "still pooping" when you were on the floor? You didn't even have to time to start pooping in the first place.
mikepzz 27
Must've had to go really badly, but I agree. It sounds fishy :o
barbsillvy 10
I'm laughing so hard that I woke my daughter up! Lol
man_in_black08 28
If OP is a girl, i can imagine how ****** this situation can be for you :) But if OP is a man...oh common its bro code tht we do far worse stuff sometimes :P
keiNan_fml 35
unless op is high
Cooldude6158 22
Well that stinks!
sweetest_jenn 18
That's one way to take a dump lol
worldclassrager 41
That may have been a prank that you accidentally fell into...
timmeeeee 10
The toilet was thinking of you the whole time.
ShadowPsychosis 4
Used to have a few issues with our toilet seat becoming detached and needing replacing every few months, we switched to a seat with metal fixings joining it to the bowl over the usual plastic, never had an issue again. I had a sudden drop in blood pressure once and passed out on the toilet, woke up on the floor having a fit, to this day I'm amazed i didn't have an accident on the floor. A shower, some bleach and a mop will soon sort you out.
ecstasy22 12
Hahahaah...EPIC..one of the craziest fml I have ever read
seeoseek 18
Sounds like a shitty prank!