Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand when I shouted, "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML
Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML
Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML
Today, I thought I might need some anger-management classes, after I punched a hole in a kitchen cabinet when my dog wouldn't stop yapping every time the rooster my neighbors just got made a noise. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML
Today, I came home in an awful mood, and grumbled to my wife that sometimes I want to strangle my boss. My wife regularly screams up and down the house over the most minor shit, but apparently this upset her so much that she took the kids to her mom's, and is demanding I get anger management. FML
Today, I was so tired at work that I stared at the microwave waiting for my food. It was a full minute before I realized I'd never actually turned it on after I'd put the food in it. FML
Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, bitch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML
Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML
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Top comments
Akumie 6
Pore microwave.:c it was just doing its job. **** your microwave's life
grahambertus 11
Yes, that PORE microwave. All it ever wanted was to be a hair follicle, but now its just a pimple.
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Comments (141)
neverdrinkSODA 12
I feel like doing that all the time. but I restrain myself.. its tough, but I manage
PedoPancakes 7
Nope. You don't have anger issues at all.. >.>
templhan 6
Dude. I'm pretty sure we all have been through this...
The_Hitdude 12
13-Drugs are bad, mmmmkay?
hurrican_fml 0
The microwave was just doing what it was programed to do. Geez lay off it.
aquaeyedsiren 0
are you just covering for your penis insecurity? they changed the average tmi measurement, so you can go back to your hummed and stop abusing your home electronics.
Krulin 8
Where did you get penis size out of this? Sounds like someone is projecting their own insecurities.
michaeljcaboose 7
78 - Southpark
je1222 1
Why so many YDIs? It's not OP's fault they have anger issues.
phresh_men17 3
Tone it down a bit save the anger for something that really makes you angry
dzesus 0
Lewl
JMichael 26
Now what are you gunna do when that poor microwave decides it just don't wanna work for you anymore?