Today, I'm so broke, I walked into a nursing home and pretended to be a gentleman's son just so I could get some free food "for him". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML
Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I'm so broke, I resorted to breaking into my old apartment complex to do my laundry in the basement for free. FML
Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML
Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML
Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML
Today, I was hungry and I was trying to buy the cheapest burger at Wendy's, but I'm so broke that I had to call my friends to lend me some money. Ugh. FML
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Top comments
bandaidstations 28
Did you at least give the elderly man some company while you were there? He probably forgets who his grandkids are anyway. ;) OP, in no way do you deserve this. Getting out of a hole when you can barely feed yourself is hard. But if I can do it you can too. Just don't give up working for what you deserve out of life!
dideldoodles 17
don't worry OP, your time will come! Stay focused and positive and things will eventually go your way.
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Comments (71)
radinabk 4
That is the most brilliant thing I've ever read
Bacon0426 11
You must be a college student.
shujaswati 20
Atleast you didn't sell youself....
_aPerson_ 14
Your broke, but you can afford a phone?
Nickimariek 20
Just wait, one day you'll be the old man that someone else uses for something like that.