Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML
Today, I gave my new boss a ride, since his car died. I probably should have checked the music before I started the car; I'm not sure hearing "Grandpa pissed his pants again…" as the opener to a song made a good impression on him. FML
Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML
Today, I got caught singing '80s hair metal love ballads to myself in the car by the object of my affection. FML
Today, I learned that if you're going to light a bottle rocket and throw it out the window of a car, you should roll the window down before you light the bottle rocket. FML
Today, while I was reluctantly driving to work on a Sunday, some guy in a shiny Audi threw a plastic root beer bottle full of urine at my old Toyota. He didn’t even bother to put on the cap on, like a gentleman would. FML
Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML
Today, I was hanging in the street with the boys, listening to some jams on my car's new speaker system. Some asshole from the apartments above me threw a bag of trash at my car. Direct hit. FML
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Top comments
Aelaena 6
Wow assholes. I hate people like that, I hope you got a license yet that probably wouldn't do much.
zmiddz 0
Gangbangers drink milkshakes?
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Comments (243)
dg72592_fml 0
#85 **** 15 inch go 22. subwoofers are my favorite thing in the world. don't hate
AlienMind 0
lmao @ #112
livestrong9 0
that is beyond terrible! i hope you chased those douche's all the way to wherever they were going, and talked some serious sense into them. people are so ignorant and immature. FYL though.
heyhoe_fml 0
its so lame when people start a story off with "i learned that...." seriously its not funny or witty or anything. just lame. thank you.
Will09 0
least u got a new color 4 free
Shoopman 0
They make shotguns for a reason.
jaimesmiles 0
#2 is an idiot. theres nothing wrong with listening to your music loud. anyway, i haaate people like this. i hate all gang bangers or wanna be's sooo much their lifestyle really makes them have no purpose in life, just to screw up other people's lives. this is so sad, i would be so pissed off
that_guy01 0
i'd have been so pissed i may have chased them down. No idea what i'd have done if i caught them though haha. That sucks so bad. And i see nothing wrong with blasting music in a convertible, i mean you kind of have to if you want to hear it with the top down. At least it was something good and not shitty rap or pop music. I would have tried to get the lisence plate, if not to report them just to remember which vehicle to vandalize later.
xiloveyoux3 0
hahahahaha oh goddd, i could imagine some kids who i know doing this xD
turdburgers 0
Well, at least they didn't get to drink their milkshakes.