Today, I just realized the harder my girlfriend comes during sex, the louder she snores after. I've tried earplugs but sometimes, like tonight, once I am up, I can't fall back to sleep. My choices are thus great sex and no sleep, or great sleep but no sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML
Today, I have to sleep in another room, with the door closed, because if I don't, my girlfriend's snoring will keep me awake. I was diagnosed with chronic insomnia because of this. FML
Today, my girlfriend snores like a lumberjack. Even when I leave to sleep on the couch, I can still hear her through the door. She won’t go to the doctor because, "snoring runs in her family and they’re all just fine." Yeah, uh huh. FML
Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML
Today, my mother is snoring so loud that I can still hear her with the door shut and with earplugs in. So much for sleep. FML
Today, my husband once again woke me up in the wee hours to have sex. Don’t get me wrong, the sex is great but as soon as he nuts he rolls over and goes right back to sleep. I however am stuck awake and can’t get back to sleep no matter how hard I try. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML
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Top comments
blobzorz 0
sleep is better
tysta 0
Just Jack off and sleep good.... Problem solved.
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Comments (111)
blobzorz 0
sleep is better
breakingakajav 0
great sex-- and great sleep, and by that I mean time for a new gf!
karina_said 0
do it during the day(:
slappomatt 4
wow if that's the worst thing that happens to you your doing pretty damn good. you. know something like 3/4 of women don't come regularly be happy you found a good one
buddybudda 0
uhhh. what kind of girlfriend snorts that loud I have great sex and sleep like a baby you need a new girlfriend.
SynchUp 0
-high fives LtWiggles-
babyteef 0
fake, snoring and orgasms are not related.
shananigans 0
My sister, for whatever reason, snores louder when she's extra tired. Maybe the OPs girlfriend is similar, in which case OP must be really wearing her out!
SirWhatsHisFace 0
15, that's because you are a baby.
Thatguywhotrolls 0
allyannamarie, I'd think you were kidding, but since you posted the same thing twice, your probably not. Sex is in no way more important than sleep, and health expert will tell you that. Not to mention the health detriments of energy drinks and caffiene.
mrguy266 0
23..how would they come with THIS kind of a story?
buddybudda 0
ya but a manwhore baby just remember I could do a girl anywhere I want all the girl has to do is put a blank over me and no one will ever know
debiasio69696969 0
Amazing sex > anything else
ericownz101 0
shove your meatstick in her gaping snore emitter, problen solved
youngrob 0
8- coffee and energey drinks don't keep you up that long.
iSitt 0
put your earplugs in her nostrils
swimchic007 0
lol 52
IchbinSyn 0
Agree 52 ftw
In_your_face 0
Sleep is for the WEAK!!!!!
cincin75 0
Apparently, you are a big snorer.
ericownz101 0
lol sweeet me ftw
skittle68 0
I hate it when people snore :(
IchbinSyn 0
73 wanna Plug into my amps;)
ninomunoz 0
81... ugh.
waimcyked10 4
goo 83!
JGood08 1
******* win
xKazama_Blood 0
I guess a good dick puts a girl to sleep
julian1179 0
ooooor you can try having sex in the morning instead of night there problem fixed! =D
blue_eyes4602 0
I agree with 4
hogsss 0
mix and match. balance is key
sleepyman 0
duh! just have sex all night
Giorgio272 2
while she is asleep just put your dick in her mouth. o wait this sounds like another fml I have read. o well.
bbbbbbbbbbaaaaaa 0
instead of having sex with her just jerk off, it feels good and you won't have to worry about her snoring
Crimson35124 0
hold her hand, maybe she'll stop snoring like the girl from a week ago
120796gators 0
yeah 15 u have not had sex or u wudnt hav that stupid pic and hookers don't count
120796gators 0
31 u r the biggest idiot everyone nos sleep is way more important than sex she was just kidding there r such things as a joke
sAnChEz_98 0
umm ok if you think sleep is BETTER than sex, you either havent had a good lay or you are a virgin!!!!!! come on! (pun intended!)
purple_madnessxD 0
#6 - I concur ^_^
soupey_fml 0
Snorgasms!
kool_me 0
have sex during the day
woody768 0
Alternate =D
transam87 0
put a gag ball on her
tacoking5000 0
that'll show her
IchbinSyn 0
My man snores no matter what the only answer sleeping pills , Valium
davidhasmorefun 0
you could always smother him with that giant rack of yours
IchbinSyn 0
79 haha his name is David my fav name I don't wanna kill him just quiet him n he freaks at sudden moves or sounds
tysta 0
Just Jack off and sleep good.... Problem solved.
sparkman97 7
Doesn't matter had sex
ashylarry 0
alternate days then. people are ******* stupid.
Fridiculously 0
that's what I was thinking.
1LL337 0
YDI for making her cone hard every time. Try switching it up sometimes and go slower when she's close
Kazze 31
How does one make a woman "cone"? ... also, why would you make it seem like that's a bad thing? "Oh, you give your girlfriend intense orgasms, you ******' LOSER!" That made no sense.
bigojac2000 0
deal with the snoring. u just have to go to sleep before her.
fbpns 0
Hey, if it's great sex, you shouldn't get any sleep anyway! Am I right?
writergirl23 19
Not everyone has sex all night. Doesn't have to be all night for it to be great.
brackaman 18
*Woosh* That was the sound of the joke as it went sailing over your head 160
missangela 0
make her sleep on the couch :)
janey123 0
Have amazing sex, then quietly move to the couch, and if she asks you why, say you thought you may have been snoring and you love her to much to wake her up. I do the same thing, and my bf( now fiancé) did that. Now we alternate who sleeps in the guest bedroom after amazing sex. We sleep well AND have the best sex in our lives.
xfcanadiam 1
that is just funny
R3kli3 10
put a walmart bag in her mouth
habeeboburky94 0
name of guy in this pic please?