Today, I just realized the harder my girlfriend comes during sex, the louder she snores after. I've tried earplugs but sometimes, like tonight, once I am up, I can't fall back to sleep. My choices are thus great sex and no sleep, or great sleep but no sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML
Today, I have to sleep in another room, with the door closed, because if I don't, my girlfriend's snoring will keep me awake. I was diagnosed with chronic insomnia because of this. FML
Today, my girlfriend snores like a lumberjack. Even when I leave to sleep on the couch, I can still hear her through the door. She won’t go to the doctor because, "snoring runs in her family and they’re all just fine." Yeah, uh huh. FML
Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML
Today, my mother is snoring so loud that I can still hear her with the door shut and with earplugs in. So much for sleep. FML
Today, my husband once again woke me up in the wee hours to have sex. Don’t get me wrong, the sex is great but as soon as he nuts he rolls over and goes right back to sleep. I however am stuck awake and can’t get back to sleep no matter how hard I try. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML
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Top comments
blobzorz 0
sleep is better
tysta 0
Just Jack off and sleep good.... Problem solved.
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Comments (111)
dynky 3
try morning sex?
1FFguru00 2
great sex > sleep i thought this was a no brainer
protonosd 0
i bet ur girlfriend is really fat because the fatter u are the louder u snore
hassenpfeffermmm 0
I don't date snorers. That's a deal breaker.
miraclemidgit 0
Or... you know, MORNING SEX.
lahp 0
pillow on face :D *warning may have side effects including death*
Belief_fml 0
Ok, sleep one night, have sex the next, rinse and repeat.
Xx_Saint_xX 1
3 ****** halarious
mr_miyagi 0
YDI for not learning karate
romanisque 0
Your girlfriend is a f***king DOUCHE! Man, just get a new girl instead of good earplugs. Seriously, i mean, no offense, but what kind of girl is she to have a tendency to snort louder after having great sex.
shadowsbane 0
Enjoy your hand.