Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to take my son to hospital because he had two Lego pieces up his nose. He’s 19 and shoved them up there because he was drunk. FML
Today, I picked up my idiot 20 year-old son from a party. He was shit-faced drunk and managed to drop his vape out the window as I was driving. He tried to open the door of the moving car to get out and look for it, and I had to grab him and pull him back in. Legally, this moron is an adult. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
Today, after my 22-year-old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML
Today, I spent six hours at the ER. Why? My husband dared our seventeen-year-old son to recreate a 'Jackass' trolley-hedge diving stunt at the local supermarket. What wasn't on my groceries list was a broken arm, fractured wrist, whiplash and cuts and bruises. FML
Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML
Today, I had to rush my 14-year-old son to the hospital after he fell out of a tree while trying to take an obnoxious "extreme selfie". FML
Today, my youngest son had to have stitches on his chin. He did great; I passed out. FML
Today, my youngest son thought that RedBull actually gave him wings. What it actually gave him was a trip to the ER and 7 stitches. It also gave me a meeting with social services. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Vert90 11
Well, those Pringle cans are sneaky as ****. Careful for the hand-rapes.
Calyx_fml 22
It was probably worth it. You wouldn't want to waste a Pringle.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (161)
Calyx_fml 22
It was probably worth it. You wouldn't want to waste a Pringle.
alyshasocool 8
It's pringle licking good!
KeyboardWarrior 10
I would jump into piranha infested waters for a BBQ Pringle. Just kidding, but I would punch you in the face for one, so you better share.
NoisyNykkii 10
The pringle cans are waaaay to small. But I wouldnt cut off my hand..... I don't want bloody pringles.
classpyromaniac 6
Today, some drunk guy with a pringles can stuck on his hand almost ran me off the road...
jackson_young 1
ur dam right
a_purple_orange 4
This was Calyx's 1500th comment! Congratulations! We should celebrate somehow...
ChickenNuggets22 0
Its a 1500 comment PARTAY!!! :DD
classpyromaniac 6
I think some of us need to get out more...
taco_bender 12
Hahahahhahaa, once the FML universe sucks you in you dont wanna leave.
blackheart24 10
Does anyone else ever put two pringles in their mouth to make the duck bill?
Calyx_fml 22
Wow. I had no idea. I still haven't had one of my FMLs published though.
ShyAnn29 15
Calyx, me neither
hellbilly205 17
Well you will someday i mean you're only -92 years old!
manyourlifesucks 0
19 lol noone actually corrected you... They just thumbed you down.
BunBunBabe 8
22 how could he drive drunk with a Pringles can trapping one hand??
False_Stupidity 42
Hehe, a Pringles party for Calyx's 1500th comment.
tjv3 10
Well on the bright side at least he didn't try cutting it of hisself while drunk
Vert90 11
Well, those Pringle cans are sneaky as ****. Careful for the hand-rapes.
buck33 14
It happened so fast. I was just reaching in for a chip and... My hand will never be the same... *shiver*
LightningCactus 12
It's a serious problem, I have been collecting and burning Pringles cans for as long as I can remember, and making sure I leave them with the earth-shattering crunchy snap after I devour their chippy goodness..
ankoku 2
Once you pop, the can won't stop!
ChickenNuggets22 0
You never know when they are going to get you. I still have the nightmares. -_-
1221jamw 11
Respect the pouch! Wait..
Viciousstorms 7
I bet you're proud.
Ray_of_midnight 23
"Drunk logic" FTL. :-(
stevenJB 25
Hey!!! It's almost impossible to not get your hand stuck in a Pringles can...for me anyway. I got big hands.
KeyboardWarrior 10
Was it BBQ? If so, it's understandable.
4everblackjack 10
Mmmm BBQ *drools*
stevenJB 25
Yes. Yes, it was :3
classpyromaniac 6
I'll bet chicks just LOVE you
sprinklecakes 4
You can pour them out of the can...
LaughinStock 16
NO 45 we are Americans we like to make our lives complicated!!! :)
stevenJB 25
I'm NATIVE American so yea I guess that applies even more.
yaya1213 6
Hey 91 is that ur black ops emblem?
stevenJB 25
Was for a while. Now it's a woman's figure. :)
forever_born 6
Well you know what they say about big hands....big feet. ;)
bwtchinheels 0
True dat'
bluebob13 10
At least he was of legal drinking age
MrSassypants 34
Yup, as long as your legal all is forgiven.
Vanilla1Thrilla 0
#7: I was thinking the same thing... And sure, just because he's legal doesn't make the situation all right, but at least he was responsible enough to be of age. We all make mistakes, you live and learn. Getting a hand stuck in a Pringles can while being wasted is by far better than driving while wasted. Be thankful for that!
MissHayleyJames 7
It doesn't matter if you're of age or not, if you get so drunk you act like an idiot, YTDI. No one should have to deal with a drunken idiot. If my son was in this situation he'd better call a buddy to pick him up because I sure as hell wouldn't.
Anonymoouse_fml 0
No, at least he didn't try to cut it off himself lol
kidwiththeface42 7
The fact he made it to the ER while being blind drunk should be an impressive offset though.
igive 29
well it could have been more than just alcohol....i mean, to cut your hand off? maybe a lil something was in that drink too
manyourlifesucks 0
Why arent comments automatically deleted when theyre this stupid?
False_Stupidity 42
87, he went to ER to have the can cut off his hand, not his hand cut off !
bexz 0
No one said anything about him cutting hand off!!
irishbohemian 0
If I had a nickel for every time that happened to me...
irishbohemian 0
If I had a nickel for every time that happened to me...
blcksocks 19
..you would owe the universe a few dollars?
4everblackjack 10
Ahh, you might want to keep him AWAY from the booze..
hellbilly205 17
He is 22 im pretty sure he can make his own choices...granted he got his hand stuck but that is the joy of drunkness getting into lets say "fun" situations