Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-blooded and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching TV and there were penguins laying eggs. He said, "Penguins are mammals, they don't lay eggs." I replied, "Penguins are birds." We fought about it for ages until he realised that I was right, and has since stopped talking to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML
Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that a tornado is not the same thing as a hurricane. I couldn't convince him, and he still won't talk to me. FML
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me and left me with the responsibility of the turtle that I never wanted but she insisted we buy "together." A little bit of research has revealed that Andre will live for "at least 30 years." FML
Today, I bought a turtle after wanting one for years. I was told that he was scared, so he would be put in a box for me to take home. It wasn't until I got to my car that I noticed that they sold me a dead turtle. I'm not getting a refund because they claimed I killed it in less than 5 minutes. FML
Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for refusing to have anything to do with "our" pet snake. The same snake I told him not to buy for his son a few months ago, because I knew the kid would get bored with it and dump the responsibility onto us. FML
Today, I got into a heated argument with my mom, because apparently I'm an idiot for not sharing her belief that chickens are mammals. She has a university degree in this stuff. FML
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Top comments
mikepzz 27
Stop ruining ninja turtles for me... *plugs ears*
loserman67 36
Tell him that alligators, crocodiles are closely related to dinosaurs and birds are actually living dinosaurs and watch his head explode.
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Comments (47)
artisticninja713 13
Sucks for him if that poor thing dies because it gets too hot or cold. In the wild's one thing but as a pet you need to help them out.
Quiet_one 22
This is a prime example of why a test should be required before you can adopt a pet (I know that would be highly impractical and will probably never happen, but it should). A lot of people don't even know basic husbandry and biology principles, they just want a reptile or a bird or whatever for the novelty of it. Then when it dies, they can't figure out why. If you think this is bad, a friend of mine once met a man who was shocked to find out that his dog had lungs. Yes, you read that correctly. She didn't ask him how he thought the dog was able to breathe, which is a shame because I'm sure the answer would have been a good one.
thejimler 9
This, except change "adopt a pet" with "be allowed to breed".
yesyesnonono 10
Its * Maybe you are the stupid one.
acerima 11
Please never reproduce with this one.
Elizakay92 6
Poor turtle
HitchHiker42 18
*its own temperature.
SquishFish 15
Today, my girlfriend yet again tried to convince me that turtle are reptiles and can't regulate their body temperature. I can't believe I'm Dating this girl. FML
redsrock23 0
turtles are amphibians idiot
BuckNekkid 22
Ditto
rocker_chick23 27
You are being sarcastic, right? They are reptiles, not amphibians. Only a complete dumbass would think they are an amphibian.
michiganlost 2
Everyone knows something that someone else doesn't know. That doesn't make other people stupid. Plus, you're wrong about this.
Quiet_one 22
I agree completely with your first two sentences, but the OP is actually correct. #65 already gave a really good explanation though so I won't repeat it here. I'm also getting kind of tired of these "omg my bf/gf didn't know this one thing fml." Knowing one thing that someone else doesn't does not make you better and it doesn't make them inferior. I'm pretty secure in my knowledge of biology/medical-related things, but I'm sure my mechanic still thinks I'm a dumbass every time I go in there and he has to explain something about my car. So biology isn't this guy's strongest subject... something else probably is. That's fine. Yeah, he should have figured out how to maintain a turtle before he got it, but just make sure he learns now and everything should be good.
doodlecloud 27
Well the first sentence is true, but only of random facts - the kind of things they ask at pub quizzes. However, I personally think knowing that a turtle is a reptile does not fall under this category - it's something you should just know, like knowing a dog is a mammal. It's not exactly a rare animal so there's no excuse. And even if you don't agree with it being general knowledge, in this instance, that doesn't matter - if he's keeping one as a pet he should have read up on this kind of thing before buying one.
Raesin 21
You're both stupid, he's stupid for not knowing basic stuff about turtles, you're stupid for picking that idiot for a partner, imagine your poor kids. (Yes, OP's right, they are reptiles, not amphibians.)