Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he triumphantly flung the condom to the ceiling, only to have it come down and smack me in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML
Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML
Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a good time. Perfect. Afterwards, he stupidly tried to pull the condom off with way too much force. It burst everywhere, splattering our faces, the bed sheets, and even the wall. Absolute disaster. We just stared at each other and laughed. Never again. FML
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, after me and my boyfriend had pretty much amazing sex, he took off the condom and started swinging it back and forth, all while making the sounds of a clock and saying, "You are getting sleepy." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Return the favor, but with a used tampon. It might be gross, but it'll teach him a lesson he'll never forget.
malfanese 6
Scumbag Steve...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (150)
MissIconic 8
Well, that's an awful way to say 'thank you for the good sex' x)
MissIconic 8
Apologies on the double post :(
MissIconic 8
Well, that's an awful way to say 'thank you for the good sex' x)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
He has challenged you. Let the slap fight begin.
DudeEvil 22
I'm afraid, he'd lose.
the_enigma1019 1
Us guys will be guys, he probably thought he was being funny.
every1luvsboners 11
That's when you grab your Black Stallion 2300XXDC Special Edition 23" ***** out of the dresser and beat the shite out of him with it. Then proceed to cram it in every orifice on his crippled corpse until he apologizes.
DarkHelmet 10
Jesus!!
Welshite 40
No, that's every1luvsboners, the bastard child of one of the FML gods. Get your deities straight.
KMtheDrummer 6
HE'S BACK
xNephilim 19
38, I don't think Jesus is into kinky stuff like that.
sheethapins 13
The Black Stallion 2300XXDC special edition 23"!?! I thought that got lost in the mail! OP, you have some explaining to do...
annie_nk 23
23"?!?! Holy fu... that's... I don't even... Do those even exist?! Where would it fit???
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
After-sex crazy
SpikyG 3
Send him a link to Meatspin. How many spins can he last?
DarkHelmet 10
Now that's love!!!!
mosquito19 14
you should finger-blast his cornhole
gmc_blossom 21
What the ****...
cIouds 15
Why am I laughing. Please down vote my horrible sense of humour.
laylay33 6
That's actually disgusting, and a major turn off... Too late for that though(;