Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he triumphantly flung the condom to the ceiling, only to have it come down and smack me in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML
Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML
Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a good time. Perfect. Afterwards, he stupidly tried to pull the condom off with way too much force. It burst everywhere, splattering our faces, the bed sheets, and even the wall. Absolute disaster. We just stared at each other and laughed. Never again. FML
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, after me and my boyfriend had pretty much amazing sex, he took off the condom and started swinging it back and forth, all while making the sounds of a clock and saying, "You are getting sleepy." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Return the favor, but with a used tampon. It might be gross, but it'll teach him a lesson he'll never forget.
malfanese 6
Scumbag Steve...
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Comments (150)
sillyyanks 24
An old girlfriend of mine once sucked me off, then spat all my **** back out into my belly button. She THEN dipped he hand in it and forced it into my mouth. Condom slap is minor.
osamasangel 6
omg that's nasty as crap. i wish a dude would do that, i would beat the crap out of him for real.
leahmae88 7
My husband does that...
outoftown 27
Good thing it's the 21st century and not the 18th; then, it would be a pistols-at-dawn moment. Be modern, and go with the used tampon to his face.
BIRDMONGA 0
Fatality..
skrewedbylife 0
mental note: do that to my girlfriend tonight...negative votes here I cum lol
diva239 8
Wtf?
doglover100 29
Slap him back.
leorising90 4
Awww
xdaftpunkxloverx 10
WOW totally inappropriate.