Anonymous
United States
Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
ironic driver
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Takes one to know one
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Nick
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
France
Ouchies
Today, I got tased, with the same TASER I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML
Jesse
United States
Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML
Username
Singapore
Today, I was put in lockup for accidentally scaring the officer by lifting my hand to scratch my head. FML
Peppered and Zapped
Appropriate force
Today, I'm recovering from being pepper-sprayed, beat with a baton and Tased, and arrested for assault. I'm a bouncer and was trying to remove a drunk asshole from the bar when the police showed up. FML
Anonymous
Oops.
Today, within 24 hours at my new security job, I accidentally tasered the head of security in the groin, causing him to piss himself. FML
Overzealous cop of the day
New York, United States
What did you expect?
Today, as a joke, I hopped in the front seat of a police cruiser and took a cute selfie while the officer was talking to someone on the sidewalk. A minute later, he dragged me to the ground and arrested me. Um… what? FML
Ilovelife07
Today, I got pulled over heading home from college. My car was full of my stuff from moving out, and I couldn't reach the glove box. I told the cop this, and asked if he wanted me to go around to the passenger side to get my paperwork. He agreed. When I got out of the car, he pepper sprayed me. FML
NotoriousSRJ
Canada
Hogs gone wild
Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML
Top comments
The_Hitdude 12
Cop: I'm gonna need you to walk on the line, son. OP: Sir, I swear I'm not dru--ATCHOO! Cop: We've got a fighter! *Zap Zap* This is how most cops behave anyway. I see a promotion in his future.
bobbeta30 14
My dad once saw a naked man with a spear running around a park get tazed.
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Comments (91)
DocBastard 40
You're probably the type of moron who would say "Douchebag!" under his hand while he fake-sneezed. Sounds like it was well deserved.
Nutty4Muffs 3
I'm sorry Doc, but where did it say anything in the post to give you that idea?
CaramelMacchiato 13
^ OR, I dunno, (and I'm just taking a lucky guess here), they thumbed Doc down because they didn't like his comment?
DocBastard 40
*shrug* I guess everyone's sarcasmometers weren't turned in this morning. Oh well.
Kenton1008 21
64, it's hard to tell if someone's being sarcastic over the internet.
DocBastard 40
If I'm making a comment, chances are good that it's sarcastic. Except for this one. Maybe.
CaramelMacchiato 13
80 - I think the Internet needs a sarcastic font. It's alright, Doc! I think a fair amount of people understood your sarcasm.
Rhysviri 10
We still love ya, Doc. :3
onlychildFTW 34
I thought doc's comment was funny. But I guess I just have a sense of humor. And i can understand sarcasm. And I think Doc's comments are always either serious or funny. This time = funny.
perdix 31
Were you charged with Assault with a Deadly Loogie? That is, after you were charged with 50,000 volts.
j_cat187 20
It's not the volts that get you, it's the amps.
nadnerbz 6
I would've been shocked if that happened to me
returnpolicy 3
I see what you did there
mikeymayhem_87 15
Just be glad his trigger finger wasn't itchin'. FYL anyways, OP
Zomg_Okay 27
His trigger finger was itching. The taser didn't fire itself, you know.
egc573 40
Always be wary of the newly-hired cops. The old guys are usually much more lenient and only get involved when it's reasonably required. But the young bucks? They'll stop you for any incredibly minor violation. Or, you know, shock you for sneezing. (Either that, or he's got a REALLY painful way of saying, "Bless you.")
FishHead 6
or new cops are nervous and jumpy. the OP probably scared him with a random sneeze and the cop tazed him out of fright and immedite response. still the cop should be disaplined
LunaDragon 10
Seriously Aquaa? you don't watch the news or read the newspaper. Google the phrase "don't tase me bro" I'm sure it will be an enlightening experience, It was the taze that shocked the world!
hhhwat 0
HA! That's hilarious!!!
aFreedom127 9
Lesson learned?
aFreedom127 9
...and stifle that sneeze!
Awahso 25
I am gonna call fake.
jwebster 8
Sue. Then cop gets fired and has to work at burger king where he belongs.